Child Maintinence Dad after advice

[Odad]

Hi everyone

Hoping for some advice, myself and ex split in June 17 and we have what i class as 50/50 live with live with arrangement. Our son spends a week with me Wednesday to Wednesday and then the same with his mother.

When I first moved out she asked for me help with mortgage as she couldn’t do this alone, I helped with this until September 18 I then got to a point of not being fair and this stopped. She then told me she required child maintenance had to be paid to her which would be £160 per month. Previously she was taking the help with mortgage as maintenance payment.

After research I believe I do not have to pay maintenance as we completely share the care of our son.

On top of me paying I also pay half for clothes uniform sports clubs etc. And plan to continue to do so.

My worry is when I inform her that I’m no longer willing to pay maintenance she will change arrangement.

Please let me know your thoughts

Kind regards

If you've been 50/50 for nearly 2 years and she changes the arrangements because of a change in family based maintenance, then that would be looked at poorly by the courts. Get a solicitor if she does this.

However, she could still claim maintenance through CMS. And if you're 50/50, but there's even a slight split toward her (I.e. Does things like doctors, dentist, primary contact at school etc), then you could be liable to pay 50% of the going CMS rate for your income. If that ends up the case, then you sound shift child related costs (uniform, school trips, clubs, etc) to your ex.

If shared care is exactly 50:50 then there is no child maintenance payable. In your case you have been 50:50 for two years so it is a well established pattern by now.

Child maintenance is meant to cover day to day costs for the child such as; accommodation, food, clothing, school meals, school uniform and travel costs to school. ie costs which are certain to arise.

In my case I pay for; birthday presents, Christmas presents, out of school activities, school trips and annual holiday as they are not day to day costs.

Good luck.

Are you married and are you getting divorced? How do you plan to cover the mortgage assuming you are on it? You need to get the long term financial matters sorted eg selling the house/her buying you out.

Are you a high earner or not?
Also were you married ?
I know you share childcare. But if she decides to be difficult and there is no court order she could change this and claim 10% of your gross income...
Who gets child benefits and tax credits?
Also maybe you should point out she can increase her houses on her child free week..

Were you married, and if so, have you sorted the finances out as part of your divorce? If you were married and haven't yet agreed a clean break she could try to claim spousal maintenance, but courts only award it in fairly limited circumstances - discuss this with a lawyer if this applies to you.

If care is truly split 50/50 there should be no CMS payable. If she tries to change the child arrangements you've had in place for 2 years so she can benefit financially, take her to court for a Child Arrangements Order.

If she does somehow persuade CMS that maintenance is payable, then stop paying for things like sports clubs and let your ex pay for them out of the maintenance. You may find that you end up no worse off. My husband's ex was agitating to change their contact arrangements for financial reasons (though she wouldn't admit that). He sent her an email explaining that she would end up no better off financially because of the additional costs she would be liable for, and she stopped trying to change the contact pattern immediately (so clearly it was about money).

Hi thanks for the reply’s, I’m average earner at 28k per year. House was sold last month she has just signed divorce papers and decre nici should be drafted now. Clean break order coming next after nici been granted. I’ve told her to increase hours find job closer to her home etc and now feel way past my duty to try and help her.

Since you have your child half the time, then I don't think you owe her more.
As said she can increase her income and I bet she won't stay single, just try to play nice, and make sure if you do school stuff you pay them direct.

If it’s 50:50 and you genuinely split the costs if clothing, clubs, school trips etc then you pay nothing.

You’ve already assisted her with her mortgage, and paid additional maint after that. I think it’s complete reasonable that you pay no maint now if that’s what you want to do. I would do as other pp have said, but the clothes and pay school directly, don’t pay her the money. I’m afraid too many people think they still have a right to their ex purses/wallets when they divorce.

Don’t forget the child in the middle please. Don’t pay her directly but cover what you can for the kids.