What happens now?

[DivorceHelp1]

Getting divorced, and i'm quite a way in but EX is now stalling big time.

No young children involved, they've all grown up.

• We've been to mediation
• Agreed a settlement between us after several sessions
• A week later he changed his mind (before he signed the consent order)

Now he is refusing to discuss anything other than selling the house (I would prefer to buy him out, and this was the initial agreement)

He can't afford solicitors, despite having one up to this point. So now he is determined to take it to court. I've explained this means there is likely to be nothing left. Total amount each; for 50/50 split, would be less than 40k each.

He is refusing to listen, and says he will go to court regardless.

I know each situation is different, but does anyone have any idea what happens in this situation. I'm so worried it will end up in court because of his stubbornness, as costs would mean we both end up with little to nothing.

If one is determined to drag their feet Courts will likely follow. If the assets are 80K total you can soon burn through that if courts are involved.

My ex burned over 35K in courts (about 30% of total nett assets) over a period of almost 2 years. FDA, 3 MPS hearings, FDR and the Final Hearing took place whilst Ex jumped from one solicitor to another.

For some reason Ex could not work out that the more spent on legal the less there would be left at the end to be split.

Good luck.

So in theory he could take me to court and I could lose it all?

Is there nothing I can do to prevent this? By all means he can piss his half up the wall, but to leave me with nothing because of his stubbornness seems so unfair.

Nope nothing you can do. If he wants to take you to court that's his right.

If he wants to take you to court that's his right.

So I have to just accept this, and he is able to make a decision which will leave us both with nothing?

Even if I agreed to sell the house at this point I still believe he would be press on to court regardless, as he claims he cannot afford a solicitor, and he sees this as the next step.

Sadly if one party is hellbent on litigation then yes...they have that right, it's called due process. The only recourse you have is to make an argument to the court to try and limit the costs. I'm not a solicitor so you should contact and discuss the situation with them. You cannot force him to do things your way, he is entitled to have his day in court and if that costs a fortune...so be it. This is one reason why mediation is so important and a major reason why I'll never marry again and why I council both men and women to avoid marriage. The hassle of getting out is huge.

To OP

If courts think one partner has been unnecessarily obstructive they can award costs against them as happened in my case.

Give your Solicitor all the facts and they should be able to work out what is a fair offer. No obligation for your ex to accept, but it might help you to claim some of your costs backnif you can show that you have acted fair and reasonable.

Good luck

Moving forward ...I will never marry again but hope some day I have a healthy relationship with someone .I deserve that there can be happiness in a relationship as well as sadness.
I’m not against marriage though but I have now some understand of how a person can change and how money becomes the root of evil.
When a relationship goes as bad as some it’s like a wound but it needs the healing process ,,it could at a time become weepy and scaby ,picked and healing has to start again but in the long run it will heal.but a lasting scar will remain .
Marriage can be as good for some as ours was the opposite.

What difference is it making to him if you buy him out or sell the house? Does he think he will get more money and if so how much and why.