Responsible adult in charge of a child when swimming

[Esther505]

XH - who lacks even a scintilla of common sense at the best of times - has been taking our DD swimming when only days ago he broke his collarbone. He has a pool in the apartment block he lives in so this is not like a public pool with lifeguards and other people there. DD is just 6 and can swim, but not strongly or expertly. I am really worried about this. According to DD he gets in the pool with her, but surely he can't be a responsible or fit adult to be in sole charge of a young child in a pool? I don't know what I can reasonably say to him. If I mention it, he will turn very hostile, I know. Any thoughts, o lovely Mumsnetters? EST.x

Have you tried framing it around his own health and vanity?

I use to do loads of sport and some people when knowingly injured kept training/exercising. They ended up being threatened by medical staff with casts if it was a broken bone to prevent them exercising, coaches would send them home etc.

In your ex's case he risks his collarbone setting badly like one of my friends' who didn't realise her collar bone was broken and continued to exercise. As men tend to go topless he would then look "odd" for the rest of his life.

Is he actually trying to swim or is he just in the water with her? I don't see a massive problem with it. I would imagine he's just bobbing around with her and is still there if she gets into trouble. Private pools like this tend to be fairly shallow and consistent depth too.

Maybe mention your concerns but not confrontationally. Just that you are concerned that he is injured and just wanted to check for her safety.

Thanks both. Good advice. particularly the bit about appealing to his vanity. I get the point about him being there if she gets into trouble, but is he competent to rescue her should she need it? Anyway, thank you. I am probably over thinking this.
EST

I'm assuming he isn't swimming as that would be very painful with a broken collar bone. If he is supervising I am confident he would still manage to get her out of the water if necessary. Unless she is swimming in a bit where he can't stand up but that would have to be a pretty deep pool.