Writing down what we went through...

[Mum35x]

Sorry I should have put this on my other post. Stbx started the divorce and did it on behaviour which I can disprove. I originally wanted to start it because his behaviour (addiction) caused our marriage to split but I was advised not too as if he were to contest it it would cost me alot of money. Anyway he filled out alot of lies in the application for the decree nisi which upset me as I can disprove them. My new solicitor has told me that I can write down what actually happened and ask for it to be on record (it wont go to the court for the decree nisi, thats been granted) its just a way for me to get my point across.
The thing is everytime I go to do it I feel like I'm going to be sick and do I put everything down? (There were times he was abusive) or keep it to the minimum? He was verbally abusive to our Dd aswell which I have recorded. I just dont know how much of it to put in. I'm finding all this very hard and at times I dont hate him I just feel really sad like grieving. Thanks x

Hi, I could have written your post. I left my oh in 2016 and unfortunately got back with him in 2017.
Plucking up the courage and resources to leave again.
Write it all down, I know it's hard but I sometimes question my decision but seeing if all written down helps me know I am right to leave that things are not normal.
I get you re grieving, I'm not grieving him but rather the life I had dreamed/ hoped of.
I feel now I can only rely on myself and it's time to make a better life for myself x

I wrote as much down as I can remember as well. About everything in my whole relationship and marriage and I've included add ons like the way her family treated me.
I expect there to be lies and more lies told about me and I won't be excepting it. I hope I never have to read it all again though and use it against her in divorce because neither me or my daughter can take any more. I just want her to be fair with me over finances and let me go. I don't hate my wife either.
I originally wrote it all down a few weeks ago in case anything should happen to me.

Hopefully one day the courts will accept a no fault Divorce. Under the current system the need for one partner to blame the other just adds to the the stress and cost.