To put baby’s father on birth certificate or not?

[Pinkroses1]

I’m currently living separately from Ex husband but haven’t yet divorced officially.
He’s done something so vile and don’t want to see his face.
I’m now 34 weeks pregnant and I’m thinking if he should be on the birth certificate?
If I was to put him on there does he have to come with me?
I hadn’t changed my name when I got married so you couldn’t tell I was married unless you saw our marriage certificate which I don’t know where it is..
Could I put him on there without him being next to me and without proof of marriage certificate?

If you’re married they should have a record of it so you shouldn’t need your husband there. But I would definitely put him on it, he’s the baby’s father regardless and every child has a right to know who their dad is. Plus as you are married he has parental responsibility anyway.
I know when you aren’t married there are ways around getting the baby’s father on it without him being there, I think they give them a form or something but I don’t know 100%.

putting him on the birth certificate will give him automatic parental responsibility - this means that in the event of any situation such as, for example, he decides not return the baby to you during a visitation, the police would not be able to do anything more than refer you to the family courts. Obviously this is an extreme scenario but it does happen! There was a lady on here last year that was separated from her infant daughter, for three months by her Ex, that it took to go through the family courts and eventually return her daughter to her care.
Parental responsibility could be awarded by the court IF the father decided to apply for it but he'd have to apply and show /present in court, which would at least apply scrutiny to his intentions towards the infant and a legal framework to the visitation schedule which would protect you from 'extreme' scenario such as refusal to return.
I don't mean to scaremonger however I felt you should be aware of the significant loopholes and pitfalls that can occur.

I think you will find that if you are married your ExDh will have parental responsibility whether you like it or not. It is only (as far as I am aware) a choice if you are not married. In fact you have to take the father with you if you are not married.

If you are married he automatically has parental responsibility and you can put his name on without him being there.

It is presumed in law that if you are married at the time of your child's birth your child is the biological child of your husband. ... your civil partner will automatically have parental responsibility for the child.

From the internet on parental responsibility.

If you are married or in a registered partnership, you automatically get parental responsibility. The man automatically becomes their legal father. ... after your child is born, you automatically get parental responsibility.

From Gov.Law.

Thank you all for all the info, looks like I’m going to have to put him on there unfortunately but do I have to give my baby his last name? I would rather he have mine so they know he’s my child..

You can register him with your surname, yes.

If your ex doesn't like it, he can apply to the court to change it.

Don’t give the baby his name.

You don’t have to put him on the birth certificate either - but he will have parental responsibility automatically because you’re married. I think you prbably need some legal advice before you do anything.

Just checked, I read your other thread. Definitely don't use his surname. His actions are a very good reason why your family shouldn't have to have that. If he tries to get the court to change it, I would run a case on that basis.

No, you can name the baby whatever you want to.

To clarify, the baby's surname does not need to match anybody else's in the family. I'd suggest giving your maiden name and changing your own, if you currently have your husband's name.

It has been a while since I registered a baby, but if I remember rightly you get a piece of paper to take to the register office to register baby.

Don't let ExDh get his hands on it, or he can register the baby himself. A married father can register the baby on his own and you don't have to take baby with you to do it.

Have you moved out of or has he moved out of where you were living together? Get all your maternity paperwork changed to your address, as I can't remember if you are given paperwork at the hospital or they send it to you. Presumably if you are in the family home he may have a key and could get his hands on paperwork you don't want him having.

Maybe it varies from region to region but I registered DD last year and there was no paperwork involved. Just made an appointment online and showed up.

Also, tell your midwife. They're on the lookout for dv etc and may be very helpful if it's anything like that or which would make him a risk to the baby.

I’ve moved out of where we were living because it was his parents house, I’ve just recently changed my GP and hospital both near my mums thank god. If I receive anything it should come to my mums address.
And he will definitely be having my own name!

pinkroses sound advice, tell your midwife, gp, health visitor etc about the risk your soon to be ex husband poses, be totally forthright about the dv and the circumstances under which you fled the babies father, they can help safeguard and support you and your baby.
Although your husband will acquire parental responsibility automatically if you are still married when the baby is born, he has no right to be there, no right to be there on the ward or at the registration (but if he got hold of the paperwork he could register and name the baby without your knowledge or consent, so keep the paperwork your midwife gives you tightly under your control!) It would be more practical for you to name the baby your future name and deed poll yourself to change your name to match your baby. Wishing you the best