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Divorce just what are the steps?

7 replies

definitelymaybe8 · 22/12/2018 23:50

So separated about 7 weeks, both still in marital home until my rental becomes free in early March.
Agreed finances etc but not through solicitor trying to avoid that.
What are the steps? I've heard that you can do it quickly,? Or is it two years separation?
Looked at websites, all seems very confusing!

OP posts:
AmyDowdensLeftLeftShoe · 23/12/2018 03:15

Are you in England and Wales? If so there is no quick divorce it will take you around 7 months to a year if everything goes smoothly with few court delays and you don't make mistakes. The websites like advertising quick divorce but they are talking batshit as it is only possible in Scotland.

Does s/he agree to the divorce? If so then the quickest way in England is that one you files for unreasonable behaviour using criteria you both agree. The person accused of unreasonable behaviour pays for the petition, which is currently £550.

Be aware using unreasonable behaviour makes amicable couples turn on each other even though no-one outside the court, the couple and their legal representatives will ever see the petition details, which is why lots of people use two years separation. Using two years separation you split the cost of the petition.

It is worth using a solicitor/legal service to check over your papers as loads of petitions get sent back due to errors and this can cost you £95 each time plus delay proceedings. Also if you don't use a solicitor/legal service when citing unreasonable behaviour the judge could throw out the whole petition saying the grounds aren't unreasonable. Plus some divorce courts like Bury St Edmunds are known to have delays of a few months per stage. In addition you need a (financial) consent order where the agreement is written up by a solicitor/legal service and approved by a judge, so years later neither of you can claim from each other or any new spouse/civil partner. This needs to be done immediately after your decree nisi is approved but before your decree absolute comes through. There is an application fee of £50 and with other legal costs you can go 50-50 as you are both in agreement. You just need to find a solicitor/legal service who will act for both of you to check papers and draft the consent order.

So first stage is to talk to your ex to find out if unreasonable behaviour is a route you can go down. If not then you need to wait two years from the 7 weeks where you were no longer a couple. (Make sure you have some proof that you split up on that date 7 weeks ago.)

Next stage is to find a solicitor or legal service to act for both of you.

HollyBollyBooBoo · 23/12/2018 03:58

Go on YouGov website, lays it out all very simply.

coppercolouredtop · 23/12/2018 04:22


separated 4 years but not divorced. amicable. he keeps house and i keep my pension. we dont need solicitors.

definitelymaybe8 · 23/12/2018 05:56

Thank you England
At the moment not unreasonable however that could change.
How do you prove the separation date?

OP posts:
wishingitwassunny · 23/12/2018 06:06


HollyBollyBooBoo · 23/12/2018 11:33

@definitelymaybe8 if you both agree on the fact that you want to end the marriage and can agree why - bearing in mind it will be stated on court documents then I'm not sure why you'd both want to waste money on a solicitor.

I know each case is different but my divorce honestly couldn't have been more simple. Follow the steps on YouGov or citizens advice. Mine was done in just a few months.

wishingitwassunny · 23/12/2018 13:32

How does it work with buying/selling property? Our house is going on the market in the new year and I’d hoped to have it sold and a new house bought (with my 1/2 of the equity) by the start of the new school year. If we aren’t divorced does it mean I can’t buy a new house without him having a claim to it/ if he does the same we’d be liable to 2nd home stamp duty? From what’s been said in pp it would seem that even if we go down the speediest route my timeline is a bit optimistic. How does it work?

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