I really need some advice, I have to know that things will get better than they are now because I feel so desperate.
I recently left my husband in sept, we have 2 children together, plus I have raised his other 2, my step children, for the last 8 years.
On leaving, he has stopped me from seeing my step children at all. We are 50/50 with our other 2, (1 week with me, 1 week with him), but it’s proving really difficult.
We don’t have a very amicable relationship; I have tried, I really have, but he’s making things hard.
Our marriage was tough, emotionally abusive, and in other ways too, but I eventually found the courage to leave. I don’t think he’s talking very kindly about me around the children, telling my step
Children I’ve abandoned them, just like their biological mum did, telling our two that I’m a horrible person and he doesn’t like me any more. He refused to let me be a part of their birthdays As it was “his week and they didn’t need me around”. And if he had his way, I wouldn’t be seeing them at Christmas. As it stands, it’s my week, but I’ve said for him to keep hold of them For Xmas eve and Xmas morning, and I’ll pick them up at 11. And he can have them over for a couple more days when I have to work so they all get to see each other throughout the Christmas period.
He’s recently got a new girl on the scene, a friend of mine, and she’s already met the children and done the things that I would normally do with them at Christmas, that he never has done before (writing Xmas cards for friends etc) and I feel as though he’s just trying to replace me.
I’m the one that’s left, in a new place, which is too small, I have no car- everything is different and weird with me, it’s all the same with him. As much as he might be trying to manipulate them, at the end of the day, my children saw me leave, and I just feel like they don’t love me anymore, certainly not as much as they love him! I have always done everything for them, been a good mum, but I feel like I’ve broken everything. Like they’re just seeing me out of duty as I’m their mum.
My husband has told me he still loves me, despite this new girl on the scene, and wants me to come back. I feel like I should go back just so I can be with my children.
Everyone keeps telling me how brave I am, but I feel so lost and broken.