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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Second thoughts on split

2 replies

Mumao · 04/11/2018 20:58

I split with my Ex in May... for lots of reasons... we were both sleep deprived, I suffered with pnd (our daughter is 2 now), I was diagnosed with endometriosis and was just having a pretty shitty time. I thought ex was really unsupportive, lazy, unloving etc etc. He thought I was miserable. A big thing tho is that he could not communicate with me. I ended it after getting really angry and fraustrated with the situation.

After a few months things are good between us as co-parents. I’m having therapy for pnd (and other issues from childhood) and dealing with the endo.

Ex and I are spending quite a bit of time together.. in the past week I’ve had dinner at his once, we’ve been out once for his birthday and he’s had dinner at mine twice. All with LO. There has been no talk about us or anything.

However, spending this time with him is making me realise why I loved him in the first place. without all the daily gripes of living together I actully want to spend time with him. when we were breaking up, I could stand being in the same room as him.

We’re now talking and joking around. spending quality time with our lo as a family and it’s nice. No bickering etc.

I’m finding myself attracted to him again!

I don’t know what to do! I’m so confused. I know I made the right decision at the time as the home environment was so unhealthy.

Any advice please?

OP posts:
Doyoumind · 04/11/2018 21:05

The only advice I can give is to be careful. Don't get carried away with thoughts of where this could go. For a start, you don't know what he's thinking. Perhaps you get on so well because there is none of the relationship pressure. Think carefully about the reasons why you split. Is this something you could discuss in therapy?

Mumao · 04/11/2018 21:19

Exactly, I don’t know what he is thinking and I’m so aware of why we broke up and keep reminding myself of that.

I just don’t know if it’s something I should talk to him about or just forget about it, stick with my decision and move on. If I do decide that then we will have to stop spending so much time together which is a shame for my lo.

Yes, hopefully something I can discuss in therapy.

OP posts:
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