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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Finally absolute

9 replies

madcatladyforever · 04/10/2018 07:17

After crap advice from solicitors and looking at costs and after initial anger all round me and my ex decided to do the entire divorce process ourselves.
We met for lunch every month to discuss progress and did the whole process online. It was tough as at times I felt so angry as did he.
But we felt more angry at the drama whipped up by solicitors.
20 year marriage, I agreed to pay him £10,000 as although the house was in joint names it was originally mine.
Consent order was agreed immediately by the court to our surprise, we thought we's have to go to court to discuss it.
Whole thing cost next to nothing and no solicitors fees. Now we can get on with our lives.
if you can do it then do it. It's a good idea to get the consent order drawn up by a solicitor as it will be rejected if it isn't perfect.
Even though he petitioned and we did everything on time it still took two years as the courts are so slow.
But it's done now and at very little cost. i think it's important to swallow your pride and thoughts of revenge and just do it yourself.
Not always possible I know, certainly wasn't with my first marriage but I seem to have come through it relatively unscathed.

OP posts:
Chamomiletea · 04/10/2018 07:21

This is really refreshing to hear.

Thanks for sharing

Munchmallow · 04/10/2018 07:30

Well done OP for keeping it civil, I know how difficult that can be.

Here's to the future! WineFlowers

purpleface · 04/10/2018 12:42

Well done, that is great news. I'm Shock that it still took 2 years even with everyone agreeing, but glad to hear it all worked out eventually.

Notbeingrobbed · 04/10/2018 13:44

Well done, you must be so relieved it’s over.

lilli30101968 · 06/10/2018 13:09

Thanks for sharing madcatforever your experience . I am divorcing my husband for 20 years and want to do amicably with no solicitors fees it can be expensive . I have sent forms to court and they ve sent him his copy and a form to sign and return to court. He did not mention anything to me thinking he would be happy to do amicably We have a joint a morgage and kids 18 /14. I was planning to get a solicitor for advice what I am entilte cause I do not have no idea how to work out the financial bit . Can we make a draft settelment and present it to a family lawyer or do we find each a solicitor check before . Thanks

MissedTheBoatAgain · 08/10/2018 05:45

i think it's important to swallow your pride and thoughts of revenge and just do it yourself

Best post I have seen for a while. My Ex did not want a Divorce as she knew that it was the end of the lavish "feet up, but get everything anyway" lifestyle she had enjoyed for 10 years.

Have still kept to this day the text she sent which was;

"I want to see you Bankrupt"

How someone who has gone bankrupt is supposed to pay the Joint Lives SM she applied for I have no idea?

MissedTheBoatAgain · 08/10/2018 05:48

Can we make a draft settlement and present it to a family lawyer or do we find each a solicitor check before

You will both need a Solicitor each. Solicitors can't represent the two Parties at the same time.

If the Consent Order drafted is considered fair to both the Family Courts will stamp it.

lilli30101968 · 09/10/2018 20:13

thank you MissedTheBoatAgain

Mumstheword1987 · 10/10/2018 23:24

I'm going through divorce to it's now been 2 years so can finally do it myself and ex is glad the divorce is moving along quickly and hopefully here's to be finalised within the next 2 ish months good luck op

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