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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Original poster

How did you know your marriage was over

12 replies

LouiseEmily30 · 29/09/2018 16:59

Hi all,

I feel i know my marriage is over at this point. I juat can't see anyway back.

I just wondered what the moment or signs where for others if your willing to share

OP posts:
ltsnotok · 29/09/2018 21:03

Being happy when he was away for a few days and dreading hin coming back was a sign it was over
for me!

heymammy · 29/09/2018 21:09

Wishing he would have an affair so I would have an 'excuse' to end it

MyShinyWhiteTeeth · 29/09/2018 21:11

Coming back from hospital after a bad miscarriage and despite him being told I needed bed rest and no strenuous activity for a few months - having to go out shopping on my own as there was no food in the house.

JeSuisPrest · 29/09/2018 21:17

Mine was death by a thousand cuts which finally culminated in him having an affair and me feeling very relieved I could finally call it a day.

Picking him up with our 5 year old daughter in the car at 6.30am one Sunday morning after he'd been on an all night bender (with his girlfriend) was quite a low point though. Sad

Original poster
LouiseEmily30 · 29/09/2018 21:43

Thank you all for your replies!

I deffinatly relate to the being away. I stay at my parents all weekend!

I also find myself just wishing he would just find someone else!

OP posts:
Original poster
LouiseEmily30 · 29/09/2018 21:46

Jesuisprest ... my shinywhite teath. Im so sorry you had to go through that! Xxxx

OP posts:
JeSuisPrest · 29/09/2018 22:05

@LouiseEmily30 18 months on we're all a lot happier. We co-parent as best we can with the odd slip up on both parts every now and then, but we're only human.

I wish I'd had the courage to call time on it at least 3 years before I did and not waited for the affair. It painted him as the bad guy to all our friends and family, but we both knew the truth of it. Our marriage was on the bones of its arse and it could just as easily have been me that strayed given the opportunity.

I'm in no rush to meet anyone new, but he's still with the OW so I think there was more to it than just sex which strangely gives me some comfort, that he has found someone he is happy with (and I don't have to live with his selfish fuckwittery anymore Smile).

Do you want to talk about your situation? x

MyShinyWhiteTeeth · 29/09/2018 22:26

I had a lot of time to think in the hospital. I felt numb and very logical. I needed support and none was available from my partner.

My emotional state really helped clarify the situation. He just wasn't there for me.

ladytink · 29/09/2018 22:27

When my husband filed for divorce after a major argument and refused to discuss what happened or take any responsibility, as we were both to blame for what happened. He has lied and lied on the divorce petition, making me out to be a nasty,violent and abusive person, that I really am not, to the point where I’m now questioning myself and doubting myself. I did want to try to make things work but now I’m thinking that I’ve had a lucky escape x

Originallymeonly · 30/09/2018 09:33

When I realised that for the last six months he'd either been sulking on the sofa in silence or screaming in my face and that this wasn't the "forever fairytale" and I couldn't save him.

fuddle · 23/10/2018 11:23

Any good books on separation? It's early days and I'm hoping time will help. The guilt is over whelming me.

fuddle · 23/10/2018 11:24

Sorry thought this was a new thread. The first two about being happy when they are away and wishing they had an affair resonate with me!

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