How to move on?

[hotelzanzibar]

My exH announced he wanted a divorce and had slept with someone else in a very calculated way just a few weeks ago - booked a hotel in advance to meet and have sex with someone he had only had coffee with (he says). I am feeling so deeply humiliated, ashamed and hurt it is preventing me from getting on with anything else - looking after the kids, work, seeing friends. I have support around me but it doesn't seem to matter what anyone says, it is the most damaging thing that has ever happened to me. How have others got through this?

So sorry you are going through this. Sounds like it is all very new and fresh so dont expect too much of yourself. I am only a little further down the road than you (7 weeks since STBXH left for OW) so not sure I will be much help. My sister bought me a fantastic book called 'breaking upwards'. Some of it I am not ready for yet but other bits are proving really helpful.

Talking to other people going through similar can br helpful - there is a thread over on relationships called 'getting there - hugs along the way' that is full of lovely, wise people who are at various stages of divorce/separation who have been really helpful for me.

'How have others got through this?'

Slowly. It's tough. Google The Grief Curve and maybe get counselling?