Think he will hide money.... feeling unsettled

[Justwantaneasylife]

Hi, I’m feeling quite desperate at the moment. Started divorce proceedings last month and had first mediation appointment (individual one).

My concern is my STBEXH and his money. He kept the family home, earns nearly triple what I earn but he is self employed. He is being overly reasonable at the moment and I just don’t trust him. He has said he will be fair financially and doesn’t want me to struggle but I’m convinced he is hiding money.

How do I prove it? I’m terrified of not getting what I should and continuing to struggle!

Just realised I’ve added to my last post! Heads all over the place!!!

Get yourself a solicitor and try and get a recommendation off here - i expect your gut instincts are right -if his reasonableness goes out the window once you have a solicitor be prepared for a fight - mine said all the right things until i got to that point and then proceeded to screw me over - my solicitor out of her depth but didn't admit it - has left me in a financial mess that I am still trying to recover from 18 months after FH - don't let his niceness fool you!

Wow. How did you get an 89% share? I’ve not been told that’s possible by any lawyers. But then I’m a working mum, not a stay at home mum.

I worked part time but my ex kept lying and trying to cover up his earnings. He blatantly lied to so many judges then he didn't pay his solicitors and I think all of that helped. He (and the OW) we're spending £1000s every week on crap while refusing to pay maintenance as he 'couldn't afford it'. So think it was a combination of things, plus I'd put a hefty deposit down on the house which came from the sale of my house. my fab solicitor had got him to sign something years before saying that all profits from the house, equity etc were mine and he couldn't benefit financially from the house - something like that, it was done to protect me before marriage while we lived together for n my house as a friend of mine had been shafted by her ex.

Hi again all, 15 months into divorce pricess and still sharing house with ex....I too was wary of STBXH hiding stuff but he didn't, not that he could really since we are both just salaried and in the same pension scheme. Just a word on Uni, your child is NOT classed as dependent for the divorce as soon as they hit 18 and leave school, even though they actually still are for Student Loan. It's ridiculous. At least with your child resident with you they should get more loan than they would with joint income. So get divorced in good time for that! My understanding as others have said is that a home for the kids takes priority so he will have to support that. Good luck!