I don’t love him anymore.

[Marthajp]

I have been with my husband 14 years.
For the past 4 years I have not found him physically attractive. When I look at him I know he is a good looking man, I just don’t fancy him. I can’t see and for him to touch me and tense up whenever he does. Sex became a chore which I really did not enjoy anymore and dreaded. I wanted to cry during and after and couldn’t wait for it to be over.
As a result we haven’t had sex for 2 years.
He is a lovely lovely man. He does everything he can for us and is really perfect in every way. I just am not in love with him any more and I don’t know why.
I want to leave. But I feel guilty for my children if I leave. I also know that my family will disown me if I leave. I feel guilty for my husband as he has done nothing wrong.
I like him. I just find myself wanting to be anywhere else when we are alone together.

Did you find him attractive before? I just wonder what has changed for you..do you feel you have explored all avenues before separation?

Could you access counselling to help uncover any issues.Divorce is not an easy road so knowing its absolutely right is important to get you through the times of doubt.

It is hard I had the same after 15 years. I did leave and I met someone else. The divorce has been horrific because he was controlling in some ways and this is no different. I feel very in love with someone for the past 18 months who is lovely with the children. I think somethings can change and if he knows how you feel he might try harder. But I also know you cannot just find there feelings if they are not there...