How to people afford to live after separation/divorce?

[Betti]

I have decided that I can no longer go on living in this sham of a marriage. The final straw was when my husband beat up my 13 yr old ds last week. But how do people afford to live alone and support DCs? I work part-time in a school so get paid a pittance. I have no savings because my husband wastes money drinking and gambling. We have a huge mortgage. I don't even know where to start. I'm so scared of telling him it's over and finding ourselves homeless, car-less etc. I would never be able to afford rent/bills on my own. Please help.

Tax credits, mostly, tbh.

But.. He beat up your 13yo?! I'd call the police and have him removed.

You need to teport the assault on your child to the police immediately.
Take your child to the gp to be examined and any injuries documented.
Contact Womens Aid.

Report.

My DS doesn't want it reported. He loves his dad so much and just wants to be loved back.

it is not your DS choice really. You need to protect him from his dad.

That’s not your dad!s choice
You’re the parent
Bloody report it

I'm really worried for your son. He's currently at risk living with someone who has beaten him up. You've allowed him to stay there and not report it. He should be out of that house. You could actually get in to trouble for covering this up for your partner. You're supposed to protect your child.

I'm sorry but your son would never report it given his age and love for his dad. Any mad that can beat up his 13 year old son is dangerous and needs dealing with, so your children can be protected. Do the right thing and report him

Jeez, you haven't reported it?? You have read news stories about children being killed by their "loving" dads haven't you?! Ffs.

But yeah, tax credits, working tax credits, housing benefit. And csa.

You'll manage, somehow we do. I have had times when we had only beans & pasta in the cupboard & £5 to last the week. But we managed & survived & it was worth it to be away from the stress & unhappiness.
Staying with your H when he has been that violent is dangerous for both of you & models bad behaviour as acceptable.

Start making plans now , look at " Entitled to" benefits calculator, you might be due more than you thought.

You have to get out .. you have no choice. Your poor son .. you will cope , start planning and check out Citizens advice. Look for a new job. You think you won't manage , but you will.

It’s tough in the early stages. Tax credits have been a lifeline tbh.

You should be able to get some maintenance from stbxh as well if your son stays with you (which sounds like the safest thing for him).

You may be better off selling the house and getting somewhere smaller too, it’s a big upheaval I know but it’ll help hugely from a financial POV.

Hope it all works out

Hows things OP?