Thinking about Divorce and finances

[Purplejay]

Early days but it won’t hurt to get some ideas about our finances. Thoughts/experiences welcome please

I earn more than stbx. I earn just over 30k while he is self employed and earning about half that. I was part time up to 2 yrs ago but ended up applying for full time as I couldn’t manage. I say I and not we as our finances are separate and he paid me a fixed amount each month (sometimes) for food/bills. We have an 11 yo. The house is in my name, mortgaged/bought with equity of mine from a previous house and money from my mum, now passed away. He also had money from inheritance/a previous house much of which was lost to share dealing/poor investment. He does have some left (or so he tells me). I very much feel it is my house but am aware that the law might not.

He has a masters degree and managerial experience so the potential to earn much more than he has. He may end up looking for a job now he has to live in the real world. For now though there will be no maintenance (which I accept) and I reckon I can just about manage here on my wage. My mortgage is managable. It’s a 4 bed house so am not averse to downsizing in a couple of years. There is quite a bit of work needs doing inside and out but I plan to try to get it done. The house has increased in value by around 80k since I bought it 8 years ago.

I consider myself primary carer for DS, get him off to school, do all school stuff, homework etc. Buy and iron all his clothes. We both do laundary and cleaning and cook, although I tend to cook more than him. Stbx is here after school. No pick up to do now as DS walks home with a friend. This will continue for now. He is happy for DS to live here with me (thank goodness) and to see him after school most days and some weekends, perhaps with some overnights. I am keen to establish some routine but also prepared to be flexible, certainly for now while we find our feet.

I suppose what I am wondering is how the law might view our finances when we divorce. I obviously realise he would be entitled to something but what. Is his earning potential taken into account rather than his earnings?

Another thing I wondered about is if we could agree a financial split and arrangements for DS ourselves, will a court usually approve it or do we need to disclose our finances to the court?

Thanks.

If you can agree then that would be best, I think a court will ask for a statement of affairs as a safeguard but shouldn't overrule unless very unbalanced.If you csn get him to agree in principle you could take it to a solicitor for their input.

Are there pensions? I think it would be worth knowing what he has left as courts would view his housing needs as a priority.
He will need to maximise his earnings going forwards and get a statement of his mortgage capabilities.
Starting point would be 50:50 and after a long marriage the equity is considered joint assets.

You may need to consider increasing your mortgage to buy him out if he cannot buy at least a 2 bed for himself and your son.

Sadly the reality of divorce is that financially both parties are generally worse off.
If you are amciable that is so much better for your dc so hopefully it can continue.