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Divorce/separation

How to support DD?

2 replies

CoconutGal · 22/04/2018 13:51

Ex husband left the family home today. We split up 2 weeks ago (my decision) & it has naturally been very tense ever since. We have done nothing but argue. The only thing we can agree on is how to support DD in terms of childcare etc. However I feel that since DD will live with me, there should be things I should talk to her about to make sure she's ok. Anyone have any tips or advice? She's 12yrs old.

OP posts:

Thanks

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Onlyoldontheoutside · 26/04/2018 16:19

Lots of reassurance and love from you both.Whatever it looks like on the outside she will be hurt and may be protecting you by not showing it.My DD was 12,now14 and has needed counciling(though my ex gave her a thorough taste of what he was like to me to her near the end).All you can do is watch carefully,listen and just be there.Try not to argue Infront of her.
My situation is probably a bit different as she started self harming as a way to cope and with his behaviour starting to be aimed at her we had to leave with minimalbelongings.
Having regular contact with her dad is very important I think.All the best on starting out anew.

Thanks

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lozzalou93 · 26/04/2018 17:41

Same as PP, but also notify the school. Often these sort of situations show in behaviour and it may be good for her form tutor to know what's going on, this would obviously be kept confidential but other adult eyes may help.

And again, never slag each other off in front of DD, she loves you both and deserves not to feel guilty for that. Even if you end up hating each others guts, regular contact and love from both is needed

Wishing you all happiness