Housing options

[Wave2wave]

Some insight please. I am divorcing from my husband. 2 dc who will live with me. I have the option to stay in the family home. Stability for dc, harder for me to move on, will lead to resentment from ex and will likely result in him overstepping boundaries when visiting dc. Will also stretch me financially. Or move to a smaller house closer to school. Clean break, more affordable but more disruptive dc at an already disruptive time. Dc are 8 and 3. Thank you.

Move. Fresh start for everyone. The kids will adapted and you will be much happier for all the reasons you have listed.

I'm another one for moving on.

I’m opting for the stay put. Ds really loves the house and area and general, but will be moving with his mum at the end of school year. Want to give him continuity and hoping that I won’t feel too sad at being there alone for much of the time. Will be getting a lodger. My ex has behaved in a selfish cruel way so I’m not pining for her although I feel very sad at the loss. Time will tell if it’s the right choice, it may not be but at least I’ll have tried.

Following but don't want to lurk

Thanks shitwithsugaron
Firstly I thought I wanted to stay in house for least disruption to the dc, now I don't but will see if mediation throws up any rational solution that I haven't thought of.

Amazing how many lurkers we have there

move. kids are a moveable age.

I chose to move when faced with this situation. Although it's a lot of extra stress, I've never regretted it. My DCs preferred to move and they benefitted from moving nearer to school and to an easy location. The things you say about your ex and boundaries sound significant. Just go for it and have the fresh start.

I'm lurking too... I think my STBEx is finally going to move out after announcing that he was leaving in November. I initially thought that I'd stay in the family home (it's in my name only, only me on the mortgage) but now I see the benefits of moving to somewhere new in terms of a clean break and starting again. I probably won't, though, because of the cost of moving.

springer could you redecorate or renovate to make it new and more you and put just your stamp on it?

Springer. I second moving things around or a lick of paint. New cushions or lights. Just make it your own.

Thanks! I’ve pretty much started that already... with a new shoe rack. I love organisation.