He inherited a house while we were married

[mammymammyIRL]

Just told dh I was done with trying to save our marriage yesterday. We have two young children

He inherited house next door with granny flat before we married. A family member lives in it currently.

Granny flat is uninhabited but wouldn't cost a lot to make habitable.

My suggestion short term is to make granny flat habitable and whoever doesn't have the children at a particular time use that space, he said (in temper) that has nothing to do with me it's mine and we'll have to sell house or I buy him out.

Long term that family member should move out in a few years, I see the ideal solution to co parenting being one of us live in one house and other in next house.

I haven't thought ahead to when children are grown up and what happens to house then

Am I being completely unreasonable?
Should we sell up?
He would have a home with no mortgage then, and I would be facing starting a new mortgage after paying into one for 11 years already.

I'm not a legal expert, but having been reading mumsnet for a few years, if you are married, especially after a number of years, what is his is yours and vice versa, unless he has some kind of trust, in which case I haven't a clue.

It’s not his house, half is yours

2 houses then one each, forget the granny flat sharing.

Sounds like a really sensible approach to me particularly because you have kids etc .. but get a solicitor re what's half yours in assets

Can't exactly kick out his daughter husband and son until they build their own house! This is why I thought of granny flat in the interim.
He'll hold me responsible, he does already for the fact that his now 23 year old son moved out & in with his gf, natural rite of passage in my opinion

I don't really know much about the legalities of who owns what. But I do know that I wouldn't want to live next door to ex husband!!

I know it sounds sensible, for childcare, etc, but think about it long term. Do you really want him knowing what you're doing all the time? And what about when one of you meets someone new? I'd advise a clean break!

A couple of years ago I gave my car over to be au pairs car & bought my new to me car from scratch instead of trading and when we got an au pair we took money for his van from children's savings.
He doesn't see the money I put into our family only sees that he had this site before we built and he had some money from sale of house to put into it.
We gave money from our mortgage to his sister and to his daughter and son so this would reduce what he put into house if he wants to get into nitty gritty like that.

You need to get proper legal advice.

Endoftheline will do