Dumbed by DH friends.

[giggly]

Just a moan really. I separated nearly 18 months ago from dh of nearly 30 years. We have 2 youngish children and have remained on very good terms. No affairs just fell out of love really.
I have been really struggling with the loss of our friendships and people who I had thought would have at least text every so often to see how me and the dc were doing.
I really didn't expect invites to parties etc although dh and I still socialise with some of my friends and their dh on a regular basis.
I just feel really sad that these people who I have known for well over 20 years have just dumped me and dc as it appears that they can't be arsed to find out how we are. I tried to keep in contact in the early days of separation but have let it go as there was no responses.
The dc do ask about their old friends as we used to socialise as families on a regular basis.
Are people really too afraid to ask about our lives or just too wrapped up in their own wee lives.

No advice but just to say I know exactly what you mean. Friends who were his but became mine. Or their partners who they met during our marriage, so became as much my friend as his. I miss some of them very much.

Many people are very wary of the neediness of others when a situation changes, or embarrassed that they will say the wrong thing. So they avoid making themselves uncomfortable by just ignoring.
Has your ex been dumped in the same way? Or is he still in the various groups as a single?

This is something I'm worried about as going through a separation now.

I would say just keep getting in contact... not with all of them maybe but just a few that are special to you. They may well be feeling awkward and embarrassed to contact you so that may be part of it. Also at the same time maybe join some local activities or groups with the view of making new friends. Daunting undoubtedly but probably worth the effort. Good Luck.

Thank you for your replies. I have tried to keep in touch with a couple of them and 1 or 2 I see at concerts but have not had any texts back. Have tried really hard not to do the passive aggressive comments on fb night out pictures that a few years ago I would be at the front of.
I'm lucky in that I have a good group of strong supportive friends who keep me sane.
Their loss as I'm fantastic compnay