Anyone else an emotional wreck this new year

[isitmee]

Saying good bye to 2017 and hello to 2018 and I've never felt so sad the separation was 5 weeks or so ago and it was the right choice but I'm an emotional wreck. I miss him and feel so alone, trying to tell myself this will pass and I'll heal but I feel like I'm lying to myself, what if it doesn't? What if I've ruined everything and it's only going to get worse? I'm crying and I haven't cried like this since we separated what the fuck is going on?!

:-(

Life is shit sometimes...

Yes that it is. I just wish it wasn't shit at the start of a new year! You're supposed start as you mean to go on

I miss my partner terribly. He's overseas with his daughter right now, and I'm basically just sitting alone not doing owt. 2017 was a shit year and I'm hoping this year will be better, but I'm not holding out much hope given how much worse things have gotten over the last few years.

It's not new year 'technically' til u wake up tomorrow - so allow urself to feel as shit as u want tonight (u might need to and it does help!)

Then tomorrow, start BETTER.

GL!

Yes I've decided to just accept how I feel, it's shit so ok I feel shit, its natural. Hopefully tomorrow I'll feel differently.

Sorry to everyone else feeling crap. It's difficult seeing all the happy posts on Facebook ect, makes me feel like I'm the only one not having a good new year

I have been feeling ribbish the whole week, most lonely Christmas week ever. I was a bit embarrassed of staying at home tonight instead of being out celebrating. Until I remembered that I have always hated New Year parties and can’t see what’s the fuss about it. It is only that this time I feel bad enough to give myself the permission to stay at home and miss the festivities I hate.

I hope you feel much better tomorrow, Thankfully we are going back to the blessed routine of work, school runs, etc without the constant reminders that this should be the “happiest” time of the year.

Hang in there OP, the first few weeks are horrible, but once the shock wears off and you start to find your feet on your own, you will be ok and ready to bring more happiness into your life.

Thank you, that last paragraph really helped! I think it is shock to be honest, I felt like I was on holiday from life for the first 4 weeks then gradually reality has started to set in and I've woke up to the fact that I am on my own again and it's stung. I was on my own for the first 7 years of my eldest son life then met dp and had another 2. 5 years on I'm back here except with another 2 children. In a worse situation than before. I was at uni when we first met and I gave it all up

Hey, don’t put yourself down. Giving yourself excuses to feel like a victim (even if you are) totally disempowers you.

Concentrate on the positive, you have done a good job as a single mum in the past and you will do it again. You have the experience, you wear the badges, you will find your way.

You have also learned your lessons, you won’t make the same mistakes.

What I have found more difficult is the “mourning of the routines”. Some way, having a partner, gives you some “structure” on which you operate and without it you feel lost (for me it has been simple things like knowing I need to go to the supermarket on Friday because we were normally out on Saturday night and the whole of Sunday, out again on Tuesday and taking DS to classes the rest of the time. Now I feel like I have a lot of time in my hands and feeling very lost (but when I split with exH years ago, when DS was much younger, I felt like I had too much to do and not enough time). I have to say that finding a routine to adhere to as a single mum gives me a sense of stability (like meeting with friends every week for a coffee while DS is in a class or ensure the fridge is full before I get swallowed by the demanding weekdays at work.

We will get there again.

Thank you that was a really lovely post

And great advice about the routine thing also, I was very lost at the weekend there and realised I need to make plans for when the kids are away. Although I made a plan for yesterday and the place I had planned to go, he was there with the kids as it was his day! So that didn't work out! The bad side of living in close proximity to the ex!