Not wanting to argue pros and cons of the existence of spousal support.
Exh makes over £70,000. I make about a third of that when I’m working. I work mostly on contract and have health problems, so keep having to take breaks between contracts + my health problems are not endearing me to employers (though am generally a good employee).
The kids always lived with me post-separation and divorce as he didn’t want the responsibility. One is now grown up and moved out.
Exh is an alcoholic and eats out every day, especially his evening meal. In restaurants, not takeaway.
He owes me one payment from months ago when he claimed to be skint. Refuses to pay even £50 a month toward reducing that debt to me. I’ve suggested he skip one meal out a month and he’s responded that it costs the same to eat out at a restaurant w table service as it does to cook at home. I don’t normally bother to argue with him, but am pretty frustrated about the £ he owes, so said it didn’t cost me anywhere near that to cook a meal. He said that’s because poor ds is always hungry and I’m not feeding him properly! Ds is 6’1. Ds is very happy with my cooking and the amounts and has puzzled previously over his wildly fluctuating appetite (I didn’t & wouldn’t mention his asshat father’s comments).
The city we (him, me and the kids) live in is very expensive. The kids are grown and almost grown - I can’t move (and would have to move hundreds of miles away to get cheaper housing). My chances of being able to support myself without the bit he is court ordered to pay me are not great - we’d be in poverty (me and ds who is still in school) as child support is set very low. The spousal support has no end date.
Every month he texts me to say “this must stop” or “this will stop”, depending on his mood. It’s pretty stressful.
Has anyone dealt with this? I feel he should either take me to court again or get over it & accept the court’s decision. He keeps saying “the judge was in error” (yes, he is pompous), but in fact where we are this ruling is perfectly normal.
I’ve been advised that because of the income differential and my health he would not get much joy out of taking me to court.
I’m not sure if the monthly complaints/threats to completely stop count as harassment?