Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Flip

Original poster

Taking children away for xmas

18 replies

lightshaddows · 08/11/2017 17:00

I want to take my kids to northern Ireland at Christmas to be with my family. My ex says he's going to take out a prohibitive steps order. I live in England. Can he stop me? Do I need his permission?
Tia

OP posts:

MrsBertBibby · 08/11/2017 19:14

Yes, and yes.

Original poster

lightshaddows · 08/11/2017 20:26

On what grounds?

OP posts:

MrsBertBibby · 08/11/2017 21:03

On the grounds that that's what the law is.

Original poster

lightshaddows · 08/11/2017 22:27

So he doesn't have to give a reason?

OP posts:

MrsBertBibby · 08/11/2017 22:38

No. If you can't agree, one of you will have to take it to court, and a judge will decide.

I assume there are no orders already in place about the children?

PlaymobilPirate · 08/11/2017 22:40

On the grounds that they're his children too? As long as there's no back story (doesn't bother with the dc usually etc)

GreatThingsWork · 09/11/2017 07:41

Surely as it's still the UK, there shouldn't be an issue? I'd call CAB.

MrsBertBibby · 09/11/2017 08:04

It may still be the UK, but It's a different jurisdiction.

Justbookedasummmerholiday · 09/11/2017 08:06

Dose he have a court order with Christmas in his favour? If he doesn't then why would a court not allow you to take them? Would he really waste his time +money or is he a control freak who is bluffing?

MrsBertBibby · 09/11/2017 08:07

What are your plans to enable the children to spend time with their father at Christmas?

Original poster

lightshaddows · 09/11/2017 20:19

We've already agreed a 50 50 split of Xmas hols. Agreed that kids are with me for Xmas day and boxing day. Yes, there is a back story of controlling and manipulative behaviour

OP posts:

mustbemad17 · 09/11/2017 20:22

I was told you can take them away for up to 28 days without permission. My ex refused to allow me to take my daughter to germany to see family; i took her anyway. Got stopped at the airport cos he called up that i was abducting her 😂😂 did a 20 day visit & flew back no problems.

What's his reasoning for not allowing the kids to go???

Original poster

lightshaddows · 09/11/2017 22:06

I don't know what his reasons are it's one part of a pattern of controlling irrational behaviour

OP posts:

mustbemad17 · 09/11/2017 22:10

I'd double check but if the rules are still the same (my DD is 5 now) then i'd take them to see your family. Just be wise to the fact that if he has access to passports he can reciprocate.

MrsBertBibby · 09/11/2017 22:17

The 28 day thing applies when you have an order that the children live with you.

When did you tell him your travel plans, OP.

mustbemad17 · 10/11/2017 08:12

See we don't have anything in place, no court order, no residency order. My solicitor said unless there is specific instructions or residency issues then the 28 days stands. He does have full PR too. As long as you can prove you intend to bring them back within that time - so have a return flight booked for example - you're okay.

Not sure how long a prohibitive steps order would take, but i guess if he took one out he'd have to explain why he didn't want you to take them...which could mean he wouldn't get one if he's just being a dick

Happyemoji · 10/11/2017 08:19

If you're gone for 3 or 4 days I would go. He is being selfish and ridiculous a judge would laugh at him.

CaptainM · 10/11/2017 20:24

I would err on the side of caution as surely the stress of all that drama is the last thing you need around Christmas. My ex and I have shared care and he's refused to allow any flexibility to our order that would allow me to travel to visit my family abroad. I have applied for a Specific Issue Order and have a hearing in a couple of weeks.

Flip