DIY Divorce - few q's : finances first or issue petition now?

[SilverKitten]

Hi all, I have decided to opt for the DIY route and issue the petition to my STBXH on grounds of unreasonable behaviour. It looks straightforward enough and I know that the five or six examples I include need dates and specifics. All good so far. But I have also seen from posters that forms do come back from courts with missing information - so any advice on things to keep an eye out for would be great. Also, I am planning to share the examples with STBXH before I file - he will be hurt whatever I include but he can't deny them tbh. I am scared he will be a dick though and then the finance bit will get messy ( and I am getting a solicitor to help with that bit and the consent order drafting.) Any advice and experience with either of these ( the form and the STBXHs who go mental) would be great. Thanks. ( Or actually, should I do the finance first and then divorce - although worried he will drag it out arguing about finances and then my examples of behaviour get too old and I won't be able to include them. I just want him out of my life!!!)

Interested in advice you get as I'm thinking of SOY divorce too. X

Silverkitten...if you are doing a DIY divorce do you still have to go to mediation first?

You don't have to go to mediation before starting divorce proceedings.

You do have to see a mediator before issuing a financial application or application about the children.

Hi, I am doing my own divorce and so far so good with regards the application itself. The application is easy to complete, I submitted it and the initial acknowledgement has already been sent out - although my STBXH has so far refused to sign "as he hasn't come to terms with it all". May yet have to have the papers served. The application for decree nisci also looks simple to complete. I think that there has been a move to make it easier to complete a diy divorce tbh.
As I understand it you can only/the best time to apply for your clean break consent order is between nisci and absolute. I don't think that you have to go for mediation if you can agree your financial arrangements. I am currently waiting for my cash equivalent transfer valuation on my pension before attempting to start negotiations via a solicitor. I definitely think that all parties need legal representation to ensure that they get a fair deal as it is a final, legally binding agreement. I want to try and minimise cists by trying to remain amicable and doing as much of the 'donkey work' myself as I can as well as making sure I'll as well informed and prepared as possible. Feel free to message me. Good luck.

Thanks JohPa. Sounds just like my STBXH - really wish you good luck with that and hope he gets to closure before too long. Suspect I will be in the same position.
My understanding also is that you do not have to have mediation - if you can agree between yourselves then that's fine. And then take it to a lawyer to draft into a consent order.
I am also led to believe that a judge would want to be reassured that legal advice had been sought by both parties before signing off the consent order ( or whatever the technical term is for approving it). But I am also led to believe that if one of the parties decide they do not want to have a lawyer cast their eye over it, then that is up to them.