Did I make a mistake?

[PeanutButter1]

So. My husband moved out two weeks ago.
We were - and are - 'chummy'. Which was part of the problem.

No sex life (no physical affection for five years.) No deep or emotional connection. But friendly, pals, flatmates and we have a small child.

Family have reacted badly as we've always been so affable and steady. I think we provided eachother with parental-style security... but no passion.

He's always been a passionless guy. No interests, strong opinions, just bumbles along. By contrast, I have lots of interests, friends and more confidence in myself as my career has improved.

Now me and my kid alone in this big house while husband in flat round the corner.

Have I made a mistake? He didn't abuse me. We were affable enough.

Last few months we had been in soearated bedrooms, and I had been having panic attacks confronting the truth that I don't love him.

Guess I'm worried I'll never find love. I'm 38. I think I made a practical rather than emotional choice to marry him. But this means I've never had the emotional connection and don't know if I'll be capable of it in future.

No I don't think you have done I think you know deep down you weren't happy and this is why you have made this choose. May seem hard now but in time you will know you have made he right desision. If you believe you don't love him then it's the right desision no?

You're perfectly capable. Just need to find the right person. Focus on finding your own happy then get out there and look for someone who gives you the buzz

of course you will be capable of it in the future.

imagine a completely passionless existence for the REST OF YOUR LIFE if you had stayed with him... how depressing, and how awful to always be longing for it but bored... you would be living a lie.

38 isn't old. you did the right thing by the sounds of it...

Thank you xxxxx I just need to remember that sometimes. I feel so awful I couldn't love him. Not sure we ever really had that love. Affection, familiarity. Our situation so cosy for everyone else though. Hard for me to trash everyone's ideal image for something as selfish as my own happiness. Feels indulgent, almost.

The way things were wasn't a good example to your dc of a happy healthy adult relationship- which they need to be a balanced adult and to follow suit. .
A wobble is normal op. .

Thank you xxxxxxx it's tough right now... but yes, a wobble. Appreciate it xxx

Don't forget you deserve a proper relationship - no need to settle for less than that. .
After divorce I met dh and had ds at 43!!

He is a nice guy. We built a nice home together. But he can be very 'absent' emotionally as a husband and as a dad. I feel really sad and lonely though. He is utterly bewildered. His head in the clouds. I'm lonely, but I was also lonely when I was with him.