Really silly q about joint finances

[Giraffey1]

H and I are splitting up. Both names on the mortgage but he makes / made next to no contribution to this or other finances billls. He doesn't work so he has no regular income. Apart from a v small pension , which currently goes into our joint account.

What's the best way to disentangle myself from this? I don't want him spending money on his hobby any more but accept that in the short term I can't default on the mortgage etc. Would it be best for me to set up a new account in my name only from which those bills can be paid?

Would welcome any advice.

Are you going to be selling the house? He's going to want a share of it isn't he?

Yes, we will be selling the house and splitting the equity 50 - 50 (tho that's more than he would be entitled to in all probability).

Definitely set up a separate account! If he's not bringing anything in but lashing out on his hobby, then you don't need him draining your money.

I was in a similar situation. I moved all bills from the joint to my own account and then stopped my monthly payment from my own account into the joint account.

I was paying for everything anyway, this way meant I was still paying for everything AND NOT enabling him to spend money from the joint account. Soon got himself a job then, didn't he.

Rights, that sounds like a good plan.

Afterthestorm - we do have an overdraft agreement so I need to look into that. Good call!

I have set up my own account and in process of moving my ddebits to it. I withdrew cash and have been living off that for last 3 weeks. Its certainly made me think about my spending. Ive always been really careful but because I have been so unhappy the last few years I thought sod it and Ive just not worried cos he sure as hell didnt whilst sneaking money out of our account to spend in the bookies!
I have seen a solicitor and got advice mainly as I had the sense when we movd to have a legal doc drawn up to specify that I have paid the deposit on the last two homes and the legal fees so if I have to sell I have a bigger share of the equity.
Its such a lot to do and think about and I don't envy anyone whose gone or going thru it. All I know is 100% I have done the right thing. I'm working full time now whilst sorting all this out and looking after 2dd because he wont do anything. I barely sleep because of the amount in my brain....BUT I am now happier than I have been in a long long time.
Good luck with your separation x

Thanks, MummyMarvel - sorry you are going through this. It's tricky, isn't it .... keep focusing on the thought that you are doing the right thing, and look ahead rather than backwards. I'm doing some research on the best current accounts that are around today so I can decide where to set up my own, new account.