Woman denied a divorce by a court.

[Heathen4Hire]

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-38978661

This woman is appealing a decision by a previous court to deny her a divorce from her husband. Her exH doesn't want a divorce and believes they still have some years to go . The article alludes to the ExH being controlling.

I am amazed this happens nowadays.

I am happily married. I just thought I would share!

I read this too and am a bit shocked by it.

Obviously it's impossible to know the exact circumstances from the article, but the allegations mentioned seem tantamount to emotional abuse surely?

Just because an abuser 'disagrees' doesn't mean it's not true. Indeed, I can imagine a lot of abusers 'disagreeing' when presented with an account of their abusive behaviour.

I'm not trying to label this husband in particular, but in theory it's a frightening scenario.

I haven't seen any proper legal reports, but I can't imagine a Court of Appeal headed by Munby will fail to find a way to grant her appeal.

And give Judge Tolson a much needed mental tonic.

I don't get this. Surely the only reason you should need to get a divorce is that you don't want to be married anymore.

Sadly not.

www.resolution.org.uk/endtheblamegame/

Judge Tolson said the allegations were "of the kind to be expected in marriage"

Err, this judge needs to read the pinned thread on the relationships board!

I'm somewhat reassured that the successful defence of a divorce is so rare it makes the news like this.

But it's a dreadful decision, if the media reporting is accurate.

And presumably she can't just leave, if assets are joint and as they are both over pensions age so her income may be depehdant on that. Can you split a pension after it has started being paid out?

It's bloody rediculous. I'm guessing she's of the generation who 'kept house' so facilitated a successful career while not earning herself so can't just walk away without being in poverty. And they say we don't need feminism ...

I read this and could not beli3ve it.

She wants out. It's over.

Is a j7dge seriously denying her the himan right to leave the marriage?

I initially read this in outrage and then read comments about it elsewhere and now I'm torn tbh.

On the one hand I agree that if she wants a divorce she should be able to have one, and that just leaving would make it difficult for her to rebuild her life without access to the marital assets.

However, on the other hand it does also mean that a man (or woman) who is abusive couldn't just divorce their spouse without their say-so and then potentially force the sale of the family home, gain the right to spousal maintenance etc.

And we of course don't know for certain that he is abusive. She might be the abuser. It stated in the BBC article that she'd had an affair, something which wouldn't have gone down well if the genders were reversed and a man who had had an affair was then trying to get a divorce. Although actually the woman would then be told to let him go.

Well he has proved he is controlling in the marriage by using the law to control her. Stupid judge!

Wannabe would a husband with grown up children who was being controlled or abused go to court to stay in a marriage?
I cannot see that.

WannaBe I get what you're saying about the affair. Nothing justifies an affair. But the articles read to me as if he's refusing the divorce to keep punishing her for the affair. I don't know. The reports could be wildly inaccurate and I could be totally wrong.

quietbatperson: Forcing someone to stay married is morally no better than forcing a marriage in the first place.

That is such a relevant point that I hope it appears in the appeal judgment that grants the divorce.