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Divorce/separation

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When can I have fun again?

6 replies

meandthreehappyascanbe · 12/09/2016 00:57

Hello, I split up with my husband and moved out 6 weeks ago after a long period of counselling and six months of me telling him I wanted to split up. No matter how many times I tell him we're over he won't accept it. I feel he was an emotional abuser but I could be wrong. All I know is that the children and I are happier away from him.
We have 3 children. I didn't split up and move out lightly, we are trying to keep things amicable.

I now have the opportunity to have fun, (no strings attached) with someone else, which I would really like as a pick me up but would feel like I was being unfaithful. I don't want a relationship and neither does he. Just some company and fun from someone who doesn't enjoy making me feel awful. This person would never be serious, never meet the children but it would make me feel attractive again.

When is it ok to move on and have some fun?

OP posts:
1WayOrAnother · 12/09/2016 01:00

Whenever you feel it's OK. It's up to you, no-one else.

Difficultyear2015 · 12/09/2016 01:01

As soon as you're ready

It didn't take me long to start having fun again and I didn't care about what people thought after I had put up with such a lot of shit for so many years

So happy I had the fun I wanted to as I'm now in happy long term relationship

Cabrinha · 12/09/2016 08:47

Whenever you want to, definitely.
It is legally adultery if that matters to you (it didn't to me!)
My only "warning" would be that a lot of people post on here about 'fun' relationships that end up not so fun - developing feelings or feeling used... So I would say go for it but be clear what your own boundaries and needs from it are. Enjoy!

meandthreehappyascanbe · 12/09/2016 09:09

Thank you. I didn't expect quite that level of understanding but I do appreciate it. I can see how after a desperation it does leave you vulnerable to people taking advantage and I probably also need to be aware of being a bit more considerate to others as I'm feeling pretty cold and ruthless myself and that's not nice either.

Thanks again. Xx

OP posts:
Squeegle · 12/09/2016 09:11

If you feel ready, then you probably are! There are lots of blokes around wanting similar I think you'll find Smile. For me the whole OLD thing was a revelation after being in long term difficult relationship!

meandthreehappyascanbe · 12/09/2016 15:06

OLD? Is this a mums eat abbreviation? X

OP posts:
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