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lone parent (dad) needs some urgent help please.....

3 replies

user1470735340 · 09/08/2016 11:53

Hello all,
I have never posted or asked for help/guidance before however, here we go.
I am a 'single' parent to a 12 year old from a former abusive relationship (I have brought her up since she was born, I am now married and have another child who is 2 with my wife, all of whom, I love with all my heart and 100% devoted to.
But my current wife is currently trying to kick me and my eldest daughter out of our home (I have refused to leave) or take our 2 year old away (she will not tell me where.
She is very controlling and I would go so far as to say its border line physiological abuse... although she did punch me again last night as well!, her family support her unconditionally and I do not have family (or any friends) as I moved away from where I lived in order to be with her (if I had not moved the relationship which was good then would not have lasted as she did not want to stay anywhere near where I grew up).
As a consequence I lost all my friends as she 'prevented' me from keeping in contact.
(I think i am feeling a bit sorry for myself....hence the waffle, sorry).
I am not sure what help or advice I want but I need some, so please help as I am wits end.
I want to be with her, I want to be a full time father to my children and a good husband.
I have tried calling Samaritans etc and I cant get out on my own to see a lawyer etc as she would not let me.
Mediation etc which is what i keep getting advised would not work as she would not go to it.
I have admitted to her its all my fault (and I am starting to believe it) but its still not good enough I have no idea what to do or where to turn.
Any help or guidance would be great..... please!
Thank you

OP posts:
Enb76 · 09/08/2016 12:09

All the info you read on here about women in abusive relationships applies to men too. You need to leave. I can't advise you on how to get there but here's a male specific domestic abuse website:

LoneParentDaddy · 09/08/2016 19:23

Hi, thanks for your response. I didn't know where to post this as it's full of different threads. I don't think I need domestic violence yet but advice would be good. Getting out is easier said than done as she has a hold that I can't describe and I live her. I'm not perfect but I have never layer a finger on her and everything I do is for her and the kids...... and ultimately if I leave I am know and back foot ands I have money and her family is minted. What I would give to have a friend right now and ands pint lol

cheapskatemum · 09/08/2016 20:59

Not letting you see your friends, forcing you to move far away from family and friends and not letting you out on your own to see a lawyer all constitutes controlling behaviour. It's not your fault, she is manipulating you to make you think it is. She has hit you, that is domestic violence. I agree with Enb76, read up what you can on domestic violence perpetrated by men on women and relate it to your situation.

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