I've not posted on here before but i'm feeling so lonely and have no one I can talk to. I don't feel as if anyone in my life understands and as a result I have closed myself off to the closest people in my life.
My relationship has been in a negative place for a while, compounded by a difficult last year that included me having a miscarriage. Instead of growing together through the difficult times, we have drifted further apart. My other half does make an effort but I just feel like something has switched off inside me and that our relationship doesn't have a future. We have a three year old and all I want is to do the right thing by her. I just can't seem to make a decision and as a result seem to be stuck in a permanent state of limbo. Partly why I'm finding it so difficult to make a decision to separate is because I am unable to conceive naturally. The miscarriage I had last year followed a second round of IVF. I have two embryos on ice and have already put off an embryo transfer twice because I didn't feel ready. If I separate then I won't be able to use the embryos. This is my last chance at trying to have another baby and more importantly a sibling for my little girl.
My other half is a good person and a great dad, I just don't feel like we're a good fit anymore. I know the right thing would be to separate but i'm finding it so hard even saying those words.