Need advice about separation and inheritance

[Lottiegal]

Hello. My husband and I agreed to separate amicably over the summer. At the time I was a sahm and caring for my terminally ill mother so we agreed he would stick around and help the kids. This has been a strain even though I appreciated his help, now my mother has passed on we need to move forward. Can anyone give me advice to what I'm entitled to regards benefit etc. I have no income at the moment, am trying to sell my mums house to get the proceeds and looking for work. I need to get some income so he can leave as he can't afford to rent a place at the moment.

Also how will my inheritance be affected if we divorce? I'm hoping I can keep it as I need security for my kids. I gave up a good career to care for the children for 8 years and now I am financially insecure.

Any advice kindly received

You probably should speak to a good divorce solicitors, but the starting point is add up all your assets and his and take off debts and divide by two. If that allows each of you to be okay financially then that's it - clean break. It won't here. If you add in the inheritance adter paying any inheritance tax too does the resulting total sum after mortgage etc taken off leave you both enough for a deposit on a new house? I suspect here the inheritance will need to be used to ensure both parents can be housed and ensure the children remain housed.

However as you dobn't work and he does you will be given a period in which to find work and I am not sure of the ages of the children but it is likely depending on husband's net income he may have to pay you on going maintenance and well as for the children.

Also if there are no assets except the inheritance and not much money at all you might want to vary the will to leave the money to the children so that you remain entitled to state benefits by the way so another reason to consider taking legal advice.

He wants to avoid using a solicitor right now as he says we can't afford it. He suggested drawing up a separation agreement to cover child access, our interests in joint assets etc He has offered to pay our current mortgage and bills so I can stay here and get back on my feet.
I really don't want to move right now as we only moved here in February and have a great school and community and I need the support of friends tbh. My children are 8,6 and 4. Do you think this is a good arrangement? It still doesn't solve the fact I need money to live off right away, can I claim benefits before he's left?

I certainly think you are right to try to stay where you are living. It gives the children stability.

A temporary separation agreement now is not legally binding but by all means you and he draw it up. If the youngest child is 4 you could probably return to full time work now and that would help everyone too.

If you are living togetheri nthe same home but separated it will be hard to prove but I think you can claim benefits but I bet it's difficult to show you are "apart". Also once you receive the inheritance you won't get benefits as you;ll have savings over the statutory minimum which is why varying the will which is lawful after death if all heirs agree and is commonly done might be wise.

If people are married rather than living together then in England there is a duty for them to support each other financially so he does need to buy your food etc if you cannot get a job and if you cannot afford it yourself.

I should have said, sorry about your mother of course. It must have been very difficult.

if you cannot get full time work you could try splitting the house in two. Quite a few people do that - one has upstairs and one down or live separate lives in the same home.

I'm sorry for your loss

Make an appt with the CAB, they can give you some advice as he may be pushing you into a route that may not be beneficial for you & at the moment he is making all of the financial decisions & they won't be made with your welfare in mind. I think this it a bit too complex for the internet & you need some proper legal advice :)

Baby barrister he has said he won't try and access my inheritance money and will have that written in the separation agreement we are to have drawn up. If we have this done by a solicitor will it stand up in court once we finally divorce in 2-3 years?

Lottie gal

As Babybarrister says, you both need to seek independent legal advice. You will need to access a lawyer for a Separation Agreement anyway. Whilst a court would look at the Agreement in much the same way as an MOU in mediation, you have no idea what precipitating events could happen in the meantime which may mean that it would be inequitable not to look at it again. For example if he couldn't work through illness or injury. You are free to make whatever agreements you both like and you could use mediation as a less expensive way to get guidance. Using Resolution lawyers will ensure that they are focused on a family centred outcome. Mediation will significantly reduce costs and will give you legal guidance (not advice). It need not be as expensive as you think. The court will honour your decisions so long as they are not coerced, you've taken advice and above all, the children are provided for .