What is my friend entitled to?

[WeepingInTheBushes]

I'm trying to help my friend.

Her partner has been cheating on her for years - she has just found out. She in a non-national, both their children were born here, her P is from UK.

She has put equity into their home, (and significant labour) but is not on the deeds. She is a SAHM , and the house was bought post her having an income (she did work here before DC). This is obviously unfortunate, but for the moment is what it is.

She is petrified that her P will throw money at the situation in respect to legal representation if they separate, and be awarded full custody. She also thinks that because they are not married he would have to pay support for the DC only.

She feels very trapped, and unhappy, all I can do is listen and suggest a call to Women's Aid. Can anyone offer more advice?

Thanks in advance. My heart is broken for her.

CAB may be able to help if she books an appt with them

Ok - thanks I hadn't thought of that as well. I will tell her.

Anyone else have anything to add? She is feeling very alone at the moment. She is feeling all the weight of his family, and doesn't have the network here that he has. His family are fully backing him and telling her she needs to get over it. It started before they had DC and has continued for years.

Beggars belief really.

Anything she should be doing practically? I've told her to keep all emails etc that could be helpful later down the line.

Thanks.

I fear your friend is right - regardless of contributions to the home, she has no claim over it if nothing is in her name legally.. And yes, he is only responsible for maintenance of the dc. And no amount of money spent on a shl will change this. Marriage is so important, especially if your not financially independent or do not have joint assets/assets of your own.

Beautiful thanks - what is shl?

It's scary. I always thought once children were involved that there was no difference - never realised marriage was so important.

Feels like he knew though.

Shit Hot Lawyer.

It's sad when this happens and women find out the hard way that being unmarried means you have very little financial redress in the eyes of the law. Marriage in itself isn't about being in love, you don't need to be married to make a life with some-one but it's a very important legal contract to have in place once you decide to buy property and make babies with some-one. I would always advice my daughter to get married, not because of any moral issues but simply for this type of scenario

I doubt he will get full custody she is the mother after all, and she may get to stay in the house depending on the age of the children but i'm not a family lawyer, she needs to seek legal advice urgently

Thanks both.

From a bit of googling though it's not actually very clear cut, there is reference to the intention of the purpose of the house, ie a family home, as well as hard cash contributed, irregardless of legal owner.

It does seem legal advice is necessary - is CAB first port of call then? I guess in the absence of funds for a solicitor that where she should go.

Anyone else have any experience of not being in the deeds but coming to a good conclusion? The DC are very young if that makes a difference.

Bump - anyone??

Thank you - I will investigate.