Okay so after a horrific weekend with my husband i have decided that its time for us to separate. He is very controlling, he emotionally and financially abuses me, and he currently on the wagon and receiving treatment for a serious drug addiction, which i have had to deal with for the past 12 years. Now he is clean at present, but he is depressed and its causing him to go over the most crazy things like right at the start of our relationship my ex who i have 2 kids with and was very close to,stayed over at mine, nothing happened but my husband believes i am now lying through my teeth and is saying i slept with him. My kids are not allowed to see their dad because my husband would not allow it (ok he aint father of the year, but it was my husbands jealousy and paranoia that stopped the kids from even trying to have a relationship with their real dad).
Now after years of him stealing all of our stuff, and lying to me and taking drugs, even though since october he has been in proper treatment i just can't take any more. Some of you may have seen a post about my cousins wedding and how he isn't invited but he is furious that i am going to go without him. The reason he probably isn't invited is because he gets so annoyed if i talk to other people or dont show him off that he causes an argument. He even accused me of not holding his hand in tesco because there were young lads not much older than my son in there! (erm!!!) He checks my phone and i social media accounts, and for the past 3 nights has kept me awake till 2am texting me and coming into the bedroom to talk to me but its just him having a go. i am literally exhausted and run down now.
Anyway i feel like i am literally going to crumble, i have new job i hate, and i have to go to work for the next 3 days but i have no childcare before and after school for my 2 youngest children and i can't afford to pay the school clubs because they want the money up front and i have 70 quid to last me a week! I don't know if i should go off work sick so i can try any get myself sorted but i have only been in this job for 3 weeks (worked for them before, moved away for 8 months and just came back)
My family work so i can't ask for help from them, and i know my husband won't help me.
I don't know where to turn to or what to do next :(