My STBXH was EA and low level physically abusive to me. This occurred in front of our children. He was also EA to my elder son, aged 5 at the time. At the time of our split we had a nasty custody fight (he didn't work, I was the breadwinner) which ended with me being made resident parent and getting 4 nights per week. This was less than I wanted but was agreed through negotiation as I was told I wouldn't be able to prove anything (he admits his treatment of me) about the children. I was told his abuse of me didn't make him a bad father, etc etc.
On Friday night my elder DS (6) expressed fear about me telling his dad to give him a bath more often. I probed a bit and he said H "shouts in their faces when he is annoyed." He seemed afraid that H would shout at me. It was all a bit garbled and he was very reluctant to say more but I know exactly what he is like so I was pretty concerned.
Then yesterday I got an email from H saying that while at the pool he had shouted at and slapped younger DS (4) and was reported to the manager, who reported to SS. He was let off with a chat.
This is the third time SS have been involved with him - when he was arrested for domestic assault and removed from our home, when I reported that the boys told me he left them alone to go running, and this latest.
I don't know what to do. Should I go back to court and try to reduce his time? I want to talk to Social Services but am afraid I will look like the vindictive ex
Any advice appreciated.