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Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Divorce/separation

Changing name after divorce

22 replies

RollerCola · 26/03/2014 08:16

Can anyone give me some advice about changing names? Ive been married for 17 years and am just waiting for my divorce to come through.

At first I wasn't going to change my name because I actually prefer my married surname to my maiden one but now I'm unsure what to do.

I don't think I want to use my maiden name by itself, as I don't want to be different to the children (they will stay the same)

But I don't really like double-barrelled either, but not sure why! Not sure what to do. Any thoughts?

OP posts:

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DaisiesDandelions · 26/03/2014 13:22

I intend to keep my married surname as I prefer it and it is the same as my children's name. Whether to keep the 'Mrs' or not tho?!

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Alchemist · 26/03/2014 13:24

I've kept (so far) the married name but use Ms.

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cleoismycat · 26/03/2014 13:27

I'm changing back. My DD will always have his name but I want to start again. I know other mums and children with different surnames as they are not married but together and doesnt bother the children or the parents. And I am pretty sure IO will NEVER marry again.

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cleoismycat · 26/03/2014 13:28

And I'm going back to Miss!!

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Sidge · 26/03/2014 13:29

I kept my married name - it's the same as my children's and after all it had been MY name for 15 years too.

I hadn't used my maiden name for so long it didn't feel like my name any more.

I try and use Ms rather than Mrs though; I haven't changed it on accounts and things but will change it when it naturally needs to be changed, such as renewals etc.

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Sleepinmummy · 26/03/2014 22:35

I'm going back to my maiden name - I wasn't married very long and was reluctant to change it in the first place.

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Blueuggboots · 26/03/2014 23:08

I've thought long and hard about this one....I HATED my maiden name with a passion (had a "four letter word" in it and was very embarrassing!) so was happy to change it.
I have a DS with my married name and decided I'm going to keep it, and the mrs! Just because I think my STBXH is a complete twunt doesn't mean I have to get rid of the name. Just my opinion and I know others will feel different.
Even my new partner has said for me to keep it, even if we get married!

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RollerCola · 26/03/2014 23:35

Thanks everyone, I think I'm going to keep the married name but just be Ms instead of Mrs if that's needed.

OP posts:

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Handywoman · 27/03/2014 15:39

Am going back to maiden name. I figure being married for 15yrs in the grand scheme of things isn't hugely long. I want to cut as many ties/associations as poss!!

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Beccawoo · 28/03/2014 07:56

Kept my married name (two kids under 5 with same name) but changed to Ms. Also like how much it must wind exh up, ha ha, esp if he decides to marry OW and create another Mrs X lol! Would change to dps name if I was to marry again though.

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toddlerbed · 28/03/2014 14:18

I wanted to be rid of his name and will be when we settle finances. My kids have his name. I'm not bothered about the difference.

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DotCottonsHairnet · 29/03/2014 09:28

Am planning on going back to maiden name when my divorce comes through in a few months time.

Worst bit for me - having to change all the bills, bank stuff etc into new name and learn a new signature!!!

My kids are teeangers and happy about having a,different surname than me - if they'd objected I wouldn't have considered it.

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Thislife · 05/04/2014 19:41

A name is so much part of your identity. I could never have kept ex's name after we split up. It was important that I went back to being me.

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Meatfeastpizza · 06/04/2014 15:06

After divorce can you just revert to your maiden name or do you need a deed poll?

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MuttonCadet · 06/04/2014 15:16

To legalise it I think it has to be by deed pole.

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MuttonCadet · 06/04/2014 15:16

poll

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catsrus · 06/04/2014 15:21

Nonsense - you just use the name you want to - no need for deed poll. One of my friends was miss smith married name mrs brown - after divorce she called her self Ms Smith Brown for about 18 months - two yrs, then she just dropped the Brown part. It seemed like a daft idea at the time but actually worked really well as a transition with schools etc.

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catsrus · 06/04/2014 15:23

Legal info is here www.gov.uk/change-name-deed-poll

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MuttonCadet · 06/04/2014 15:29

So, yes, if you want to change it on legal documents you need to change by deed poll.

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Meatfeastpizza · 06/04/2014 15:38

I might just crack on and change mine back to my maiden name now then, before I file for divorce. The kids have his name which is fine, that's who they are, but it's not who I am, and I want rid of it. Mind, I'm not keen on my maiden name either, maybe I will chose a nice new name.

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catsrus · 06/04/2014 15:41

No it's legal even without the deep poll - just that some organisations insist on DP. This gives a bit more info
www.nationalarchives.gov.uk/records/research-guides/change-of-name.htm

And I know all this because 30 yrs ago I made the decision not to change mine s looked into all the legal stuff around names. You can also give your dcs whatever lastname you want, even if it's not either parents!

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MuttonCadet · 06/04/2014 15:41

You can pick almost any name you want - quite liberating really!

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