Am I being biased/a prude or is this perfectly acceptable?

[InaFlummoxagain]

I completely admit I'm finding it hard to judge this one - XP took the DC's to a wedding recently - DD is 15 and DS is 11. DD admitted straight away when they got back that she'd had a drink - I said fine, no problem. We have alcohol on the Sunday dinner table, and ask them if they'd like 'a' drink (i.e. a small shandy, a small spritzer etc), so that we're not we're not showing them that alcohol is 'bad' or 'evil', and teaching them to drink responsibly.
Ok, so it's a wedding, everyone has a drink - but she had about 5 or 6 units spread over the evening - what I would have had myself probably. (Sorry, don't want to be too specific for outting purposes.)
Am I right in thinking that this is quite a binge-y amount for a 15 year old and that XP was out of order? Or am I just outraged because it was my ex that allowed it and actually, that's perfectly reasonable?

I wouldn't be happy with that, a drink for the toast is fine but drinking all night is a bit much at that age.

I think it's too much but are you sure your ex actually "allowed" it? Unless your daughter was physically glued to his side all night, it is perfectly possible that she picked up a glass of alcohol at the pre-meal reception, then had a glass of wine with dinner (was he even at the same table as her?) and then a glass for the toast. Even if he was watching her, it's possible that he didn't realise if a waitress refilled her glass.

I think it's good that your daughter told you how much she'd had to drink but she is old enough to know herself that she should not be drinking that much. At least it happened in the controlled environment of a wedding where her parent was present, rather that than at a teenage Saturday night party.

I'd be having a chat with her about responsibility rather than your ex.

I totally agree with unexpected.

Leave the ex out of this one. Rather see it a brilliant opportunity to discuss alcohol sensibly with her. It is a big plus that she felt able to talk to you so id capitalise on that trust and use it to talk about social drinking, the peer pressure and health risks etc.

My parents always seemed to be quite laid back about me having a few drinks at that age. They let me drink in moderation at home on a weekend. It really paid o ff. when all my makes were sneaking cider down the park I didn't feel any need to join in.

She's told me what she had and that some of it came with the meal, but some of them were bought for her by her dad's XG. She does regularly try a sip of something alcoholic, and only once has she said she liked it and would have it again. I think the main problem I have is not the actual drinking, but the amount she was given being too much. XP and his friends are all binge-drinkers, and XP had a drinking problem for the time were together, so I'm very worried that she's going to be influenced by them. What with his pot-smoking (which he doesn't do in front of them, but I can't imagine he's stopped, as I've been told he was still smoking last year by a mutual friend.
She said she had soft drinks in between, but she's also said she had a headache the next day, so I have a feeling that perhaps she might have had more than she's let on.
To be honest, there's not a huge amount I can do about it now, though, is there?
It's just another notch in my 'I don't want to share my kids 50% with this twat' belt, but there's fuck all I can do about it that won't bite me in the arse later with my relationship with the kids.