Need to vent

[Mother2many]

This past weekend, my kids went to their dads. I guess on Sat. They went to a friends house, where he proceeded to drink. Both kids say, my daughter was crying because she was so tired and he kept saying, "after my beer.." (which leads to another).. Then when the left he got his 14 yr son to drive... (too drunk?) and he got stuck. So, they had to get a tractor to pull them out.

At 2:00 am, they finally get home. Both of them confirmed each other's thoughts/story.

Talking to my X is pointless.

I just feel soo bad for my children.

This was my daughters birthday "weekend" as her dad said...but pulls this on her/them.

All I could say to them, was, they should of layed on the couch and tried to sleep....

sigh.....

I guess buying her a 32 gb Ipod is suppose to make up for it..

Sharing this with you, always helps me...instead of getting angry inside...

How old are they? Old enough to look after themselves/vote with their feet? Is there a court order?

I would be calling the police and social services. They could all have been killed. Getting a 14 year old to drive is a criminal offence.

If this is for real I agree with frogs police and as urgently. He has recklessly put ur kids in danger as will you if you allow them to visit again.

What others have said, police! Definitely! How awful for your children!

OMG - as divorced/separate parents we never cease to have to deal with inadequate / irresponsible parenting. IF you are strong enough to deal with the consequences then definitely go down the route of social services...perhaps supervision court order - doesn't make your life any easier, but the alternative is out of the question - you wouldn't leave your children in the care of a school teacher / club activity who did this, the fact that it is their father does make it difficult, but it is UNACCEPTABLE.

Thanks for being there everyone.. It's always a "he said/she said" type thing. Last time I got social services involved they went and spoke to the kids at school.. and well, nothing happened. They "talked" to my X about issues.

I've talked to social services several times. Even when he took the children to the garbage dump for his weekend visits. (worked there), or when they work very little protective warm clothing when sleddingi, etc.

Nothing.

I feel like a nagging X wife in social services eyes.

I was going to talk to his mother, however, she isn't in the picture much and once said to me, "nothing I can do, he is my son".

I perhaps should of told my children to use their Ipods and contact me... They are 8 and 10. They did that before, and I immediately called my X to voice their feelings since he wasn't listening.

I have to teach my children how to act around circumstances that I have no control over...or they have no control over.

I wouldn't talk to social services, I would write to them, every single time.

Copy to the police and to your solicitor, if you have one.

I work in the NHS, where the mantra is "if it isn't written down it didn't happen".

Your ex's behaviour is horrendous, and if SS are really not taking it seriously that is appalling.

Hope it's improving..