My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Divorce/separation

husband left me for his ex girlfriend

35 replies

Labisiffree · 01/10/2012 22:04

We have been married 12 years, 2 sons, not perfect but i thought at least we plodded on. He was funny for a few weeks, very quiet and disengaged, then told me hed been having an affair, not a sexual one at that point ( he said).

He then left! I am on my own with my two DS, 10 and 11. I have lots of good friends but I feel so numb. I was so calm about him going, he is now living with her( shes left her husband) and although I am angry with him, I am strangely calm. Why?, and when am I going to fall apart?

OP posts:
Report
HappyHalloweenMotherFucker · 23/10/2012 23:37

blimey, coy, that is despicable of him

I hope you are reporting him to the police

Report
Kis2013 · 01/04/2013 17:01

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

kinkyfuckery · 01/04/2013 17:06

Kis2013 You would be better to start your own thread, possibly in the Relationships topic.

In fact, no I just read it and am reporting your post for spam. Have a lovely day [bugrin]

Report
Icangetthruthis · 06/07/2013 16:16

Wow, it is amazing to read this thread, I guess after going thru something like this one feels alone in the world... It helps to know other women are strong and surviving!

After 19 years together and 2 kids, I found my hisband having an affair with his old, first love. We are separated now and I am doing pretty well, like the one post above there is a big element of relief since he has always been a demanding jerk and hard to be around. He acted as if the decision to separate was mine to make, at least when he was being nice. But I think he knew I would leave and he seems more relieved than anything. Even though I know I am making the right decision it hurts so badly that he is accepting it and not fighting in any way to keep me!!!

This thread is so old- so here is my question for you ladies- how are you NOW? It has only been 5 weeks since I found out- how can I stop the endless, repetitive, hurtful thoughts swirling in my brain? I know logically that my life is going to be fine, easier even, and I'll meet someone else, etc. But I still can't sleep for thinking the same things over, and over, and over..... Any suggestions??

Report
sweetpetite · 27/01/2014 14:32

Thought I would update this thread, and let you know as the OP, that things have improved dramatically, and it probably took me 6 months of up and down to properly feel happy and strong again.

I did lots of internet dating which was not successful in terms of finding me a mate, but it helped me realise there are lots of nice men out there and I deserved better.

In September 2013 I met an old school friend for the first time in 25 years (!) at a reunion, we've been together ever since, and he is wonderful, respectful, funny, gentle and kind. There were times I felt I'd be on my own forever, there were times I wanted to be! I learned to be happy alone, and that's the key I think.
Divorce proceedings are going through slowly, he's still with the exgf and she's having a baby next month.... another thing to think about.
I'll think about that when it happens though...

Report
Frikadellen · 28/01/2014 12:01

Thank you for updating I often wonder what happens to people.

I am happy to hear your life is moving on and you have someone good in your life :)

Report
meeks01 · 29/09/2015 00:20

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Alicerennei123 · 12/02/2016 20:29

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

dilys4trevor · 14/02/2016 11:01

I just posted in Relationships asking about love after a shit experience. Mine is very recent and involved a death as well as discovery of an affair (suicide after being caught out - thanks for that!) but it cheers me SO much to hear that the OP is happy again. What about the other people on here?

Report
savage2226 · 11/11/2021 20:57

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.