My exH is by all accounts a narcissist. He was extremely controlling and degrading towards me.
I finally ended it in June and have seen a solicitor. I have the papers to sign ready to file with the court on grounds of unreasonable behaviour. I have seen a mediator to sort out the financial side and have all the paper work I need for my legal aid.
My problem is him. He has said he will not see the mediator as he doesn't want to pay for it and the same for a solicitor. He is making demands all the time to me over the dc and the house. He refuses to believe his behaviour was unreasonable, saying I provoked him with my behaviour (I used savings to top up the household income when needed as he never handed over a penny). OK so I didn't tell him what I had done but only because when ever I tried to speak to him about there being a shortfall in income and out goings he would go mad telling me I must be on drugs or gambling to be short on money (I was keeping a household with 2 dc and a mortgage going on DLA, CB and TC's alone)
I have 7 or 8 examples of his behaviour in my papers, all of which my solicitor has said are valid.
My problems are
1, He is going to go mad at me over these, he doesn't see a problem with 'talking' about things (his idea of talking is him shouting and putting me down and when I go to speak he tells me to calm down and stop arguing)
2, He has decided he can not afford to live in his own place, currently living with his dad and brother, so can't have the dc over(whole other story). He wants me to give up the house and move into rental because, in his words 'You have loads of money coming in, you don't have to work you will get everything paid and I get nothing so it's only fair I get the house!'
He has not paid a penny toward the dc since he left, and I don't expect to see anything any time soon.
He is self employed and goes out drinking every Friday and Saturday.
Both of our dc have sn and he is currently seeing them for around 30 5-6 days a week, most of which he just sits on the sofa and drinks a cup of tea!
I am at the end of my tether with it all and really worried about him getting his papers.