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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Bonuses and dividend payments

43 replies

bumbums · 14/06/2012 17:43

Hi does anyone know what percentage of my ex's future bonuses and dividend payments I would get? I would have thought half was fair.

OP posts:
lisaro · 14/06/2012 17:45

Why?

bumbums · 14/06/2012 17:50

Because I'm getting divorced, About to start proceedings with solicitor and have a million questions in my head.

OP posts:
scarlettsmummy2 · 14/06/2012 17:53

I don't think you should get half, sorry. I think you should get enough to live on until you get a job, but otherwise should support yourself unless there is a very good reason why you can't.

bumbums · 14/06/2012 18:02

I'm interested in your perspective scarlettsmummy2 can you expand?

OP posts:
scarlettsmummy2 · 14/06/2012 18:36

Well I think that it isn't up to your husband to provide for you financially when you aren't together anymore. Fair enough some basic maintenance but why would you have a claim on future earnings? If he does well in the future and gets a bonus how, when you are not together, have you helped him to earn that? And I would say the same thing if the genders were reversed.

scarlettsmummy2 · 14/06/2012 18:39

What if it was the other way round? Would you pay half of your earnings to an ex husband? Surely a set amount of maintenance to live on is fair?

bumbums · 14/06/2012 18:43

Well I have been a SAHM since the first DC was born. We decided that it was important for me as the mother to be with them. We decided that we felt it was important for me to be able to do school pick ups and drop offs through out their primary school years. So my earning capacity is limited.
My job is caring for our children.
It doesn't seem right that we live on the maintenance payments while he gets £10.000 or more to spend on himself.

OP posts:
MrsCampbellBlack · 14/06/2012 18:45

Well if its his own business and you have contributed to him setting it up and it being succesful - I think you should be able to claim something. Didn't someone a couple of years back get a big payout because she'd given up her career to facilitate him setting up and establishing a very succesful business?

However I have no idea as to the legalities etc.

Scarlett - I don't actually agree with you. I've given up my career so my husband could do what I've outlined above - I really think if we were to divorce I should get a bit more than basic maintenance.

But then I have shares in my DH's business which I hope would facilitate that if anything happened.

scarlettsmummy2 · 14/06/2012 18:49

Sorry I disagree- you both choose to give up your careers, you could have worked part time as many others do. By all means have some maintenance payments, but future earnings is pushing it! Have a bit of pride ladies!

MrsCampbellBlack · 14/06/2012 18:56

I'd rather have the money to be honest. I have contributed massively to my DH being able to do what he does and I wouldn't feel guilty in anyway in getting a fair share but I'd have thought it was better to do it at the pay-out stage rather than in ongoing maintenance.

I do think each situation is different really - and it wasn't that 'I' chose - rather 'we' chose.

SerialKipper · 14/06/2012 18:57

Er, they do have pride.

Pride in their part of the partnership that enables the family income.

Only someone with no self-esteem would set their SAHP contribution to the family's wealth at nought. (Unless they had wall-to-wall staff, but I don't think that's what we're talking here.)

MrsCampbellBlack · 14/06/2012 18:58

Quite serial.

I can not believe just quite how offensive Scarlett has been really but then I find some people just can not envisage any other domestic set-up than their own.

scarlettsmummy2 · 14/06/2012 19:04

I am not disputing that an ex wife should not get some maintenance but I think it is wrong to expect a share of future earnings as well. By pride I mean that I certainly wouldn't want to be supported by someone who I was no longer with- I would want to show that I didn't need their input anymore.

MrsCampbellBlack · 14/06/2012 19:06

Well yes but only after you have got a very sensible pay-out Smile

scarlettsmummy2 · 14/06/2012 19:13

Yes- what is reasonable. Shares of bonus made in the future isn't reasonable.

SerialKipper · 14/06/2012 19:17

The classic case was, iirc, a footballer with a career-destroying drug/drinks problem, whose wife was the major driver of his rehabilitation. Never mind childcare, without her intense work he'd have been sleeping under a bridge - for his very short life.

When they divorced, she quite reasonably said she was in large part responsible for his current success. And - again iirc - the judge agreed.

bumbums · 14/06/2012 19:18

I think a percentage of his total earnings, including bomuses is fair.

OP posts:
scarlettsmummy2 · 14/06/2012 19:33

But how will you impact on him making bonuses in the future if you aren't even together?

bumbums · 14/06/2012 19:36

for as long as we are entitled to child and spousal maintenance he will have to pay.

OP posts:
scarlettsmummy2 · 14/06/2012 19:41

Fair enough, but it is greedy to claim more than you need- and do the feminists amongst us no favours.

SeventhEverything · 14/06/2012 19:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsCampbellBlack · 14/06/2012 19:47

Quite Seventh.

I didn't realise that to be a feminist one had to live in penury.

Seriously if your DH earns big money and you have facilitated that - why should you go back to some small part time job which woud barely cover your bills? That's not feminism - that's letting men get away with financial murder.

MrsCampbellBlack · 14/06/2012 19:48

You don't seem to value the role of the SAHP at all Scarlett which I find strange.

bigbadbarry · 14/06/2012 19:49

It is greedy to claim more than you need - suggesting that if one partner has stayed home to facilitate the other's career progression, then she should then live on minimum wage while he continues to enjoy the profits?

MrsCampbellBlack · 14/06/2012 19:51

I guess that's why Mrs Philip Green has ensured that all her husband's businesses are in her name - an example to follow Wink

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