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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Need to know I'm doing the right thing

2 replies

Movingout · 30/04/2012 20:25

I've posted here before about living in a verbally abuse relationship. Divorce proceedings are now underway. I promised DS1 that we wouldn't move from our home until his A'levels finish (12 June). I've now ascertained that because I'm escaping domestic violence I will be entitled to some housing benefit, until the house is sold. I really need some hand holding, I've found a flat, but will have to start tenancy at the beginning on June although I'll delay moving until after 12th. I've borrowed the deposit from my mum and because my stbxh has got me into so much debt, she will have to act as my guarantor. Estate agency don't accept housing benefit so I haven't told them that part of the rent will be paid in this way. I am so scared and I am putting my children through so much. Please let there be light at the end of the tunnel and I am doing the right thing.

OP posts:
bizzey · 01/05/2012 13:40

Oh Movingout...YES you are so doing the right thing...I was in the same position as you (verbal and physical iykwim but still kept it quiet) untill 2 1/2 years ago when my ds3 then aged 5 told my mum and auntie the things that daddy "does and says to mummy"..They had had their suspicions but i am a good blagger !!

We were visiting them 200 miles from family home and....i never went back !!!(only to collect belongings)

I stayed with M and D for a few months got boys into a good school ..priavtly renting thanks to my wonderful parents for doing deposit and stuff and my boys are so happy !!!!

When i told them there were not going back they were more concerned about not seeing their friends rather than their dad !!!!

You have not said the age of your children but if was affecting a 5 year old it must effect older ones as well.

GOOD LUCK would love to know how you get on and i am here if you have any wobbley moments

Movingout · 02/05/2012 14:15

Bizzey, thank you for your message and kind words. I am so glad that things worked out for you. My children are 17 and 12 so fully aware of what happening and very sad to be losing their lovely home, but the abuse is dreadful and I truely believe that my stbxh has gone mad so they will be a lot better off when we move.

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