mum driving

[Mutleymadness]

my mum is awaiting a memory clinic assessment, as she is beginning to show signs of dementia, she is still driving at the moment and doesn’t feel she needs to stop just yet, on one hand I think she is ok on the normal little routes she goes on, but on the other hand i worry for her and other road users, she lives in a village where public transport is one bus a day, so that isn’t an option for her either, therefore her independence will be massively affected.
does she need to inform her insurance company and DVLA before a diagnosis wait until she has been seen ?.
thank you for reading and i look forward to your comments.

The fact that there is only one bus a day is irrelevant. If she is showing signs of Demetria, do you really think she’s safe to drive? Here’s the DVLA page for Alzheimer’s: https://www.gov.uk/alzheimers-disease-and-driving

If I was you, I’d contact the DVLA and ask their advice. But imagine how you’d feel if your mum had an accident and killed someone.

The fact that there is only one bus a day is irrelevant. If she is showing signs of Demetria, do you really think she’s safe to drive? Here’s the DVLA page for Alzheimer’s: https://www.gov.uk/alzheimers-disease-and-driving

If I was you, I’d contact the DVLA and ask their advice. But imagine how you’d feel if your mum had an accident and killed someone.

The fact that there is only one bus a day is irrelevant. If she is showing signs of Demetria, do you really think she’s safe to drive? Here’s the DVLA page for Alzheimer’s: https://www.gov.uk/alzheimers-disease-and-driving

If I was you, I’d contact the DVLA and ask their advice. But imagine how you’d feel if your mum had an accident and killed someone.

I think the rule is that she can wait until she has been seen and given a formal diagnosis, but if you are worried about hers and others safety then I'd start to look into other options now. Age UK runs a scheme where they provide transportation, it might be that there is a branch near her or they can set her up with a service that is. It's worth getting in touch with them now so that when she does have to stop driving she still has a way of getting about. Transport services for the elderly and disabled | Age UK

do you think she is safe? We recently went through this with my Dad. He has had a visit to the memory clinic who don't seem to think there is a problem, but he will return there in 6 months or so for a follow up. However it turns out he can't see for shit so has stopped driving thank god, but only after the DVLA got involved and made him contact his doctor before he could legally drive again. He is waiting on cataract surgery, but after that's done I still don't think he should drive. Just the cognitive decline we've all seen, I don't think his reactions are good enough to make him a safe driver. His mobility isn't great either. I'm not sure if he is going to try and get his license back after surgery or not.

My parents still do not know it was us that reported him, but my sibling and I both reported him to the DVLA. Not anonymously, but the DVLA can't tell him who reported him. so there's always that option. We tried to discuss it with him and he thought he was perfectly safe to drive, despite not even being able to read the writing on the sky tv banner at the bottom of the screen on their massive telly, so that's why we had to do something official.

There was a toddler killed locally by an older driver a few years back who lost control of her car. Very sad story and I couldn't have lived with myself if my dad did that to someone

The money she gets for selling the car and no longer running own will pay for a lot of taxis surely?

If she is showing signs of dementia of course she should stop driving. To me, driving when you know there is an impairment that could kill somebody is reckless, selfish and stupid. All sympathy will be lost for your mother if she kills someone with her car. No one will think “poor woman there was only one bus to her village, so of course she had to drive”, they will think she was a selfish cow.
I know that’s harsh, but it angers me so much when people put their selfish needs over other peoples lives.

I had this dilemma with my Dad, he hadnt had a dementia diagnosis at this point (but did later on) but when I was with him in the car he did some really odd and sometimes dangerous things. Then at other times his driving was fine. He then became very confused which it turned out was caused by a stroke (no paralysis). The confusion did subside and the consultant said he was ok to drive, but having been in the car with him I didnt feel he was safe. He had always been a good driver in the past. I persuaded him to give up his car. I feel it was definitely the best option. Driving when your mind is not 100% cannot be right and the consequences could be horrendous.. not worth the risk to your Mum or anyone else IMO. I know her independence would be affected, but with this condition I don't think they can make a safe decision for themselves. With my Dad he would be driving normally and then do something bizare, like driving alongside the slip road on rough ground rather than on the road surface - he didn’t understand why I questioned him. Then waiting for oncoming traffic to pass to turn right, ignoring gaps where he could have turned and then turned right in front of a car - I was terrified
Can you drive and have you been in the car with her to see her drive. It could be an eye opener if you haven’t

I might be considered to be an older driver I am 78.
I decided a few years ago to get a driver's medical every time I need to renew my driving licence. I do the same medical as a bus driver or HGV driver. There are several.companies who do these.
Can you suggest this to your mother? It costs money but does help me to know I am reasonably safe on the roads

A common issue impacting people with dementia is a loss of spatial awareness. There's no point asking if they're having problems as they won't have a clue. My mother drove up a kerb and nearly straight across a roundabout without being aware she'd done either. That was just as she'd been diagnosed and she seemed pretty with it at the time. Fortunately my brother was with her so he witnessed it. We stopped her driving after that. Mum was furious but she really wasn't safe. Don't risk a disaster.

I didn't know that was an option, that sounds really sensible, I wish I'd suggested that to my Dad, maybe if my mums driving deteriorates then maybe I'll suggest that, thanks for the suggestion!

We had our car written off by someone who wasn’t medically fit to drive anymore;the accident happened outside a school so potentially could have been so much worse.

Have a look at her car. Are there any unexplained bumps and scratches? That can be an indication she is having issues.
I used to work in a Memory Clinic. People are not automatically excluded from driving on diagnosis but in many cases the doctor recommends an on road driving assessment.
In the early stages a person could score poorly on memory or language but still score well in visuospatial.

I have recently gone through this. My mum attended the memory clinic and was diagnosed with alzheimers, by law the dvla MUST be notified. They then contact the drivers GP as well as the Dr's from the memory clinic and make a decision on whether the person is fit to drive or not or whether it will need a more regular review. If you mum is diagnosed with alzheimer she is entitled to apply for attendance allowance which is about £80, your mum could use this to pay taxis to get about.

My dad got confused and nearly took the wrong turning which would have put him on a dual carriageway for 5 miles, and then god knows where he would have ended up. This was on a road he’d driven numerous time in his 88 years
mum refused to go in the car with him as he just pulled out in front of cars all the time, the doctor was useless and said he was still fine to drive so mum lied to him and told him Dvla had removed his licence due to the dementia.

This is so difficult and even after being okayed by DVLA at one moment in time, the person's condition will only ever deteriorate. My husband's actual driving is still fine but he has to have a sat nav to get anywhere more than a mile from home.
It's only a matter of time and as I don't drive it will be taxis paid for by Attendance Allowance, sale of car and savings on upkeep.
Advise DVLA and keep a keen eye on her.

This is incorrect information. The DVLA considers the impact of symptoms on driving. OP please refer to the very helpful link to DVLA already posted by another MNer

This op. If she is showing signs of impairment, memory loss etc, you absolutely must act. Please don’t let her drive if she is a danger to herself and others, just because it’s going to be inconvenient to use public transport. You’ll regret it so much if she hurts herself or someone else. When my mum started down the sad path of dementia we took her car keys, then sold her car. Was it easy - no (she was very angry - albeit only for a short time as she forgot she had a car). Was it the right thing to do - absolutely yes and I’d do the same again.

Absolutely, but the incident mentioned above in which a toddler was killed by a woman with dementia (if its the one am thinking of near me) there was still far far too much sympathy for the driver...Parents of Edinburgh toddler killed by elderly driver call for licence law change - BBC News https://share.google/C6vlG6c0b5g0AxM9W

And too many people say 'oh my poor mum/dad their world would shrink if they stopped driving'....

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cm2nkv3j7e6o

Sorry, link on above post looks odd!

Have you been a passenger in your mum’s car? Maybe she should drive you both to her appointment then you will know how she actually drives. The safety of your mother and others is more important than her independence

Yes, that’s the one I was thinking of too @PamIsAVolleyballChamp. It was near me, I know that road well. Just tragic when it became clear the lady driver should never have been driving. Really brought it home what can happen.