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Dementia and Alzheimer's

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Physio have given up on my Mum

3 replies

HangryBrickShark · 18/03/2025 13:35

My Mum's been diagnosed with late onset dementia. She is 84 and until last May was living at home on her own. Then she fell, had a hospitalisation and operation as she broke her hip and went into a care home that she privately funds.

A few weeks ago she fell again for the third time in the carehome and fractured her lower lumbar region and received a bilateral fracture to her sacrum.

This was around 25th Jan this year.

Since then she's bbmeen laid flat out in bed apart from physio at the hospital managing to get her to sit on the edge of the bed with her legs over the side once.

A physio team from the hospital have visited Mum three times, the first twice when she was clearly suffering from a uti infection and was very shouty and screaming when they tried to move her.

They went in for another visit last Friday, I'd not been forewarned or else I may have attended and tried to get her to engage but she was shouting at them and really resistant.

Sadly the home hadn't put her hearing aids in that day so she wouldn't have been able to hear them and I think she was confused and frightened at these strange people in her bedroom

Apparently thst was her last chance with the physio, they've said they won't return.

Prior to her last fall she attending activities in a wheelchair with carers pushing her there and sitting in the residents lounge and she had a good quality of life.

What can I do?

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HangryBrickShark · 18/03/2025 14:06

It's so sad to have to accept this will be her life now. The care home refuse to get her out of bed as physio haven't signed her off and they are scared of litigation if something goes wring/they mske her worse.

I've been sitting her up in bed everytime I visit and she says she's no longer in pain. I can't believe they've given up on her now. She's not an aggressive individual but she is very confused, some days worse than others but she always enjoyed activities at the home and wstching tv with her friend in the residents lounge. I hate the thought of her living however many weeks/months/years in bed with virtually no contact or stimulation.

Should I try to get her into a wheelchair again? It's really upsetting for me so it must be frustrating and upsetting for her too.

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olderbutwiser · 18/03/2025 14:16

it’s a really difficult situation for everyone concerned - if she fell and did that much damage at the home it’s not surprising they are being cautious; if your mum would not comply with physio on three occasions it’s not surprising they don’t think it’s in anyone’s best interests for them to try again. But of course you want her to have a life outside bed.

Do you think there is anything that would make her compliant with physio - eg you being there when the physios come? Can you make that happen? If so maybe contact her GP and ask if another visit is possible?

HangryBrickShark · 18/03/2025 20:21

olderbutwiser · 18/03/2025 14:16

it’s a really difficult situation for everyone concerned - if she fell and did that much damage at the home it’s not surprising they are being cautious; if your mum would not comply with physio on three occasions it’s not surprising they don’t think it’s in anyone’s best interests for them to try again. But of course you want her to have a life outside bed.

Do you think there is anything that would make her compliant with physio - eg you being there when the physios come? Can you make that happen? If so maybe contact her GP and ask if another visit is possible?

Thank you for your reply
The trouble is she's so up and down with her moods or cognitive abilities.

Saturday she was very good, could follow a conversation and understood (or appeared to understand) what I was saying. Sunday I could hardly wake her as she was virtually comatose and when I could she couldn't form a word let alone a sentence.

So we never know how she will be. It's so hard.

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