My dad passed away last Monday 16th September in the early hours of the morning, he had been in hospital for 4 weeks and was extremely frail, mainly from vascular dementia (which was recently diagnosed a year ago) however he was not eating or drinking anything for weeks leading up to this. He was later diagnosed with a perforated oesophagus, 3 days before his death but he couldn’t be treated due to his weakeness. I was staying in the hospital and at my mums for the week leading up to his death, and I only came home (back to husband) after the very traumatic few days of seeing him pass. I felt my husband offered support through the lead up to this traumatic time, and the day of his passing. Since then I have felt completely lost and like I can’t talk to him at all. I wondered if this was normal and if anyone else has had similar experiences? I have always been to type of person who has to be asked how they are feeling to open up, my husband is the completely opposite and shouts about every aspect of his day (another challenge we have communicated with little helpful outcome) I am finding this extremely challenging to communicate with him, and have tried but have also stressed what I need multiple times. I feel I am at a completely loss and don’t want to be around him anymore, there have been communication issues similar to this (on a lesser scale) since our relationship began. But I feel I have always been clear in my expectations and what it takes for me to open up. I feel he has acted like this has never happened and hasn’t acknowledged my feelings past saying he also feels sad etc, I feel like this makes it about him and makes me go even more into my shell. I have definitely considered he isn’t the right partner for me before, this isn’t a new feeling but it feels massively intensified and I am considering leaving for good.
i guess my main concern is that I don’t want to use this as the reason for my distress as I have known this was an issue, but it feels unbearbale now.