Advantages of an early diagnosis?

[TheBestSpoon]

DM is 76yo, and her memory is failing. There's a strong family history of dementia. She's currently fine day to day with help from my (much younger, completely healthy) DF, but it's clear she has virtually no short term memory. For example, she can't remember that a drink on the table in front of her is for her and always checks. She also occasionally says things that are wildly untrue (e.g. that my godmother is living in a treehouse, that people from her church have come around to bully her).

The issue is that she utterly refuses to discuss her memory or go to the doctor, and becomes very distressed if this is raised. This is totally understandable given the family history and what she's seen of dementia in the elderly, but means we have no way of getting a diagnosis at this point.

So, my question is, is this a problem at this point? I'm aware it's not sustainable long term and her condition is likely to deteriorate, but is there any significant support or treatment that she'd be likely to get at this stage? Having tried several times to get her to seek help, my DF's view is that it's not worth making her upset at this stage when he can cope fine and as far as he can tell there won't be any real treatment options. I'm happy to go with what he wants as he's the one dealing with this day to day, but if there is a real advantage to getting a diagnosis now, I'd want to let him know so he can make an informed decision.

Your DF is mistaken, there are real treatment options these days. They don't work for everyone but for some they do. More importantly, it may not be dementia. There are a range of other things that it could be, right down to vitamin deficiency. Despite the family history, this could be something else that is quickly treatable but without investigation you'll not know.

That's a really good point, and one I'll raise. With the family history and similar symptoms to other family members, it's easy to make assumptions, but other things do need to be ruled out.

Agree that other reasons need ruling out.

When I was concerned about DH and he was refusing to see the GP (totally unrelated to memory loss). I called the Doctirs and explained my concern. They wrote to DH and asked him to come in for a check up, which he did.

Do you think that this tactic might work for you?

Thanks, that is a good suggestion. She doesn't have any problems engaging with medical staff about other things, so if it was under the guise of a checkup, that might work.

My mum’s dementia was treated with a drug, I think it was Arisept and her memory improved slightly and it definitely slowed the deterioration

My MIL is 77 and moved in with us in March after falling in her house in France. Saw GP and referred to memory team, now on Aricept after being diagnosed with vascular dementia and early Alzheimer's.

Just to follow up as this thread has been revived: DM has now been diagnosed with Alzheimer's and is on medication. Unfortunately, it took DF being diagnosed with cancer in January to provoke some action, but he has responded well to treatment so at least there's the silver lining that DM has a proper diagnosis and hopefully support will now be easier to come by when it's needed.

Sorry to hear that OP, but on the flip side glad that your DM is now on medication and that you can access support. My dad was struggling with his memory as well as had some physical things going on but he wouldn't go for a check up, and it's really hard unless they agree to go. He was hospitalised following a stroke and when they did a brain scan they could see the change alzheirmers had made to his brain and said if he had been able to access help earlier it might have made a big difference. Remember you can reach out for support too as it's hard for you as well.

Re having a diagnosis, it means a reduction in Council Tax as the person with dementia is disregarded, also may qualify for Attendance Allowance.