Oh you poor thing, i'm so sorry to read this it sounds incredibly hard. I'm glad though, that you have the support of the hospital and they agree that he can't come home. That is a blessing because you/ your mum couldn't manage him at home. There's usually a priest or someone in the hospital for spiritual care and he might appreciate a visit from them?

Do you know anything about Dementia, Alzheimers, how strokes play into it all?

He might possibly have delirium. Have they checked for that. I frequently have the most beautiful patients who are so gentle and calm and the next day they would gladly beat you up. We don't take it personally and the sudden change in behaviour is often met with that question. Have they tested his urine for infection? It's very likely something they have already thought of. Strokes do change behaviour quite a bit as well.

Huge hugs. Your poor mum.. Glad he's being kept for assessment. She has alot of stress to deal with

Ok. So Dementia is an umbrella term like Cancer is an umbrella term. Like you get different types of Cancer, you get different types of Dementia.

Alzheimer's is the kind where you see gradual memory loss. This gradually deteriorates over time.

Vascular dementia is where a physical event such as a stroke or heart attack causes brain changes which can include memory loss but depends on where in the brain the stroke is. After the event, you may see a deterioration in brain functioning but it won't change gradually over time. It will stay the same until/if another event happens. You can have one stroke, never have another one and won't necessarily be diagnosed with Dementia as it isn't deteriorating. So maybe they can't diagnose it at this point.

You can get a mix of the two types. There are other types too but Vascular seems most relevant to your dad.

With strokes, you can see them on scans. Diagnosis of Dementia requires him to have tests on his thinking as well - they usually start with "What day/date/month/year is it" "Where are you right now" and other things. I hope that helps somewhat.

Of course you're devastated. It's so sudden and drastic. Usually the recovery happens most in the early days and it sounds as if he has made some good progress?

When I worked on a stroke ward I had been a minister who was the loveliest man ever, but often lashed out. He'd have been horrified if he knew. He had these beautiful moments where he was gentle and mild mannered and sadly days where he wasn't.

I had the most adorable older lady who became very combative. It would take 5 to attend to her personal care. Then once she had a bowel movement was been to being gentle and we could use 2 members of staff. The 5 sounds brutal but 2 would hold her hands and talk gently to her whilst we quickly did what was required as quickly as possible so as not to distress her too much. I make sure I keep a track of bowel movements very carefully.

It's still early days for your dad. He will be frightened as well by all the changes. Can you take in familiar things like photos, a blanket from home?

As a PP says, it's early days. He's frightened, might be finding it difficult to process his emotions and think straight. No one knows how they will react if something like this happens.

Sometimes the brain can struggle to inhibit things that we might get impulses to say or do, but wouldn't usually actually do them. That can be affected by stroke for sure.
Don't worry if he refuses to do tests, they can assess him less formally.

The word for that is disinhibited. For some people that might be saying something inappropriate for example.

Morning, you do what you need to OP. Look after yourself. Just because he's had a stroke, doesn't mean he was the perfect dad, perfect man etc.

No need to apologise, if I can help i'm happy to but of course the Drs are the best people to ask your questions to. My thoughts on your last question is that it's hard to say. The good news is that at this early stage, things could change a lot. If there is a UTI or other physical health difficulty that could well be making things worse and yes, treating that will likely help. Sedatives are available but hopefully are not the first port of call.

Yes, vascular dementia was mentioned when I called the Stroke Association on Monday to ask for advice. So that's can't be diagnosed on a MRI but rather through assessment,is that correct? What I was told was that dementia isn't a disease like measles, it's a conglomeration of symptoms. So no matter what the level of damage revealed on an MRI, it's not dementia unless the functioning of the brain reveals it to be so. The full assessment for that isn't just the test we all know (Count back from 100 in 7s, draw a clock face etc), it's a long and detailed assessment over perhaps 3 or 4 hour-long sessions, involving all sorts of cognitive tests.

The tests don't have to be that long and detailed. It depends, case by case.

My mum was diagnosed with Alzheimer's without doing the long cognitive tests. They tried on several occasions to do the Addenbrookes test but she just could not concentrate for that long.

Sorry for what your poor dad is going though @wonderstuff123. I think meds could help with his behaviour but it will probably mean him being assessed for a few weeks first. Do not agree to him coming home until you have some answers and a treatment plan.

I guess that if you score low enough on the mini-test, there's no need to test any further. Probably no need to test at all.