Mum & tradesperson

[Peoniesandcats]

Hi there,

My mum has early stages of Alzheimers & Dementia. It took a couple of years for me to get her to see the GP so that they could diagnose her.

She lives on her own and there is someone who offers to do work on her house & garden - apparently today he asked to trim down the tree/bush in her garden for £700. She phoned me afterwards to say what had happened and that she doesn't want this done.

Apparently she has said no to him, but she also accidentally left a voicemail on my phone and it recorded a message as she was speaking to him.... I heard her say to him that she was going out (he asked what time she'll be back, she said she didn't know), but then she also told him to come back on Monday after she has spoken to me. Obviously neither of us want him back!

I've reassured her that I will always be there in person if she needs anything done.

What do you think is the best way to tackle this situation? I think he must have gotten money from her before if he keeps popping back. However I've not been there when he's showed up!

Mum never has £700 in the house anyway so not sure if this is a non issue and I'm just getting upset about it when it's all ok....

Make an arrangement for him to come back and make sure you are there. Then tell him in no uncertain terms if he ever comes back to the address you will report him to the police. Might be worth fitting some cctv cameras or a camera doorbell that links to your phone then you know exactly who is calling round x

Thank you, was thinking about getting her a Ring doorbell or something similar x

As well as the above I'd be contacting your local PCSO. It's likely this scumbag is targeting several vulnerable people, and whilst the police can't do anything on one report, they can keep an eye on the situation in case they get multiple reports.

As above I would report him

Yep, what the first poster said.

In the longer term...

If you haven't got PoA for her finances, see if you can do that (as long as she has capacity to make the decision, she can). Then suggest she looks after one account (so she has spending money) and make sure there's not enough in there to make major mistakes. You look after the rest and pay bills.

"I'm sorry, this is my son's house and he pays for all the maintenance" is one way of getting rid of speculative callers - it says "I am not a money pot and I have someone looking out for me".

You could also look at call blocking on her phone, so the only calls she gets are from people on a "whitelist". Bit tricky with GPs etc as they often phone from "no. withheld" (for patient privacy as much as they're own) - I've given the GPs my number so I get all the calls not my dad, but he had to sign a letter saying he was OK with this.

Damn. "their". I do know my grammar but my brain nowadays slings out words at random.

Do you live locally? I’d be reporting this man and letting him know you are fully aware of what an exploitative scumbag he is.

Don’t take the knowledge that she doesn’t appear to have much cash in the house as reassurance. A person who would behave as this man has would have no qualms in giving your mum a lift to the nearest cash point.

Thanks everyone,

I've got PoA and have an appointment with the bank on Tuesday to activate it and set up another account for her. She has one of those really old bank books at the moment.

I've reported him to the PCSO and they are coming over on Wednesday to take a statement.

Have been practising with my mum on what to say to him if she sees him, but for some reason she's adamant she wants to say she doesn't live there..... I'll phone her again to keep on practising and she does seem to understand.