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Dementia and Alzheimer's

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Getting answers and support for Mum

2 replies

flier · 25/01/2018 21:54

My poor Mum has had a terrible few years. She had a suspected tia, then was diagnosed with diverticulitis, then had emergency surgery after a perforated bowel, requiring a temporary colostomy bag. She didn't react well to the surgery mentally (we thought it was a reaction to the GA) and three years down the road still has moments of forgetfulness and confusion which seems to be getting worse.
Unsurprisingly, she's not happy discussing any of this with either my Dad or anyone else, and now has a constant feeling of needing the loo, which is really debilitating for her, she's up constantly in the night and my Dad is so worried about her. She's had trips to a&e when she thinks she's had a blockage. Sometimes I think that she's maybe been given a cancer diagnosis but won't tell us.
My question is what, as someone who lives 500 miles away, can I do to help my Mum get listened to, or treated? Anytime she visits her GP she just seems to be dismissed. My Mum is 74. I'm obviously also concerned about the effect all of this is having on my Dad. he's worried sick and Mum doesn't know how that he's told me about her being up so much in the night etc. I just don't know what I can do.

OP posts:
shakeyourcaboose · 25/01/2018 21:58

Could you see if there is an advocacy service in her area?

notaflyingmonkey · 30/01/2018 13:58

Can you write to her GP, listing your concerns? Or ask for a phone call to be booked so that you can discuss it with them? Sometimes when elderly people go to the GP they aren't always as assertive as they need to be, and therefore feel fobbed off. My DM also did a good job of masking some of the things that needed to be brought to the GPs attention, to allow for a chance of a diagnosis (eg do you take your meds ok, do you get forgetful?).

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