I try to keep this as short but descriptive and 100% truthful, because in all honesty I love her.
started off in December 2024 Christmas time, walked into our spare room at home I use it for a office and I’ve got a desk in there.
Laying there right in front of me is an invoice/receipt for men’s aftershave.
I was inquisitive and quite pleasantly surprised that maybe a Christmas gift was bought for me so like any normal partner I asked what the receipt was.
This was the first time I’ve ever experienced her reaction and it wasn’t nice in all the 10 years. This was the first encounter of her speedy entering the room and grabbing the receipt out of my hand almost ripping it.
She started off going into a rant and making up some story that I just did not believe.
For me buying aftershave or perfume for a woman is a personal gift other people might differ but I didn’t like it.
And for months even upto now she stands by he purchased the aftershave and got it sent to our home whether you believe that a lot I don’t.
December 2024 She goes to Office Christmas party where it got to 10:30 pm and I couldn’t get in contact with her up until 1:30 am when she got to a train station near our home.
The timings don’t make sense within four minutes she travelled four stations exited the train station and apparently got in a cab home. She messaged me saying “in car”i messaged her back saying “in car do you mean cab?” She replied? “Yes sorry I mean cab” suspicions were raised with this.
now in 2025, she was starting to act very distant creating arguments over nothing intimacy levels had dropped off hugely but I was oblivious to anything going on behind the scenes.
Start of July comes 2025 she goes to an Office drinks evening which is all okay with me as I was at home with our son.
She started drinking and socialising once she had finished work at 5:30 pm.
I was messaging her once or twice in the evening to see if she was okay and as a loving partner, what time she’ll be home
She didn’t return home till 4 am the next day.
Which I was fine with at that time.
I do clearly remember her coming into her bedroom and I woke up and seeing her hair dishevelled and very messy which was unlike her.
It’s now the end of July 2025 one evening I happen to be in our living room. She was also in the same room on the opposite sofa, on her phone as she constantly always is. while scrolling on my phone I stumbled across the same male coworker Instagram account that she bought the aftershave for.
There was pictures of the group of office colleagues and my partner, but in pacifically the male coworker had his hand on my partner’s lower back there was also three more pictures of them both intimately cuddling arms around each other arms around their waist leaning into each other none of the other colleagues were cuddling or nothing similar.
Bear in mind that these photos are uploaded on another male social media account that I don’t even know I find it disrespectful and hurtful.
The same evening I raise my concern and asked her why she felt the need to be doing these things. Her Reaction you guessed it was complete madness attacking me deflecting defensiveness saying how on earth did I find his Instagram? I must be stalking him. I am paranoid.
Even saying comments like “ we get on and have a good relationship” and “ I owe you nothing” THAT comment there will live with me for the rest of my life.
The red flags were starting, the lies and deceit was coming out of my partner like I’ve never experienced before. Things that I didn’t think much job before was startingto fall into place:
why she returned home at 4 am?
why I couldn’t get in contact with her?
why her hair was messy?
she could never prove to me where she was for three days consecutive where she was changed every day.
She didn’t made another comment saying “ I got a cab home and he got a cab home”
I took that as it was only them two together till 4 am.
The lies got worse, I then find hidden condoms in her wardrobe. I then also find hidden lingerie within six bags hidden in her wardrobe. For her to tell me a ridiculous answer by saying.” it isn’t my lingerie I don’t know who it is.”
It looks very new. I’ve never seen her in this lingerie and it’s her size now so it wouldn’t have been purchased 2-4 years ago when she was a smaller size it was New. And would’ve fitted her now.
The condoms were hidden within a paper prescription bag which also contained a leaflet on contraception which she later said she did get from a sexual health clinic and then proceeded to lie about she didn’t say that making me doubt myself.
It’s now September 2025 and he still hasn’t answered any questions. I’m just trying to protect our relationship and our son and our house that we own Boris point I’ve not eaten properly I’ve not slept properly. I’ve hardly been working and I’ve hardly been a father.
For 2 to 3 months, she would talk about this coworker and I didn’t think anything of it in passing conversation.
Another Office party comes along middle of September having rushed home from work to drive her to the train station. That evening she said she was with her female coworker but pictures didn’t tell the same story. She was with the same male coworker. As well as a female coworker and later I found out the male coworkers friend so I look like to me a double date.
Again, both my partner and the male coworker always side-by-side.
She returns home and all hell break loose she begins to attack me punch me kick me.
She did give me her phone some weeks after as she got an upgrade leaving her Internet searches on the phone forget to delete them two of them it says “ how to get back”
She’s now deleted the offer. Instagram blocked me constantly blocked me on WhatsApp while she’s still living with me.
come home, she’s taking our son’s passport and decided to go to abroad needing some space.
She’s now changed her hairstyle clothing she’s buying weekly. She’s now mocking me being very disrespectful.
Reactivated her Facebook and messenger app reactivate your Snapchat account and he’s now making me sleep on the floor and telling me we’ll be selling the house.
I was on my own Christmas Day Boxing Day and New Year’s as she decided to go abroad again with my son.
Any questions asked about any of this she goes crazy or she did go crazy cause now January 2026 is she looking to sell a house that we bought together.
The way she is behaved towards me is alone reasons to leave her but I do love her but more importantly I’m almost certain that she’s cheated on me. Can anyone help give me some clarity and what their thoughts would be?