Utterly, utterly stupid crap - open-season rant thread

[Daddster]

Maybe I'm just becoming a curmudgeonly old sod, but there are so many baby-related things that annoy me, for example:
surface-clean soft toys (just what are you supposed to do when your DK drops it in a puddle or in the toilet?)
dust-covers on children's hardback books (just how long are they supposed to last?)
"baby einstein" books (what kind of a cynical bastard must you be to put that title on a book and how gullible must you be as a parent to buy it?)
statutory maternity "pay" (this is an utter scandal - 90 per cent of your average weekly earnings for the first six weeks, then up to £117.18 for the remaining 33 weeks - how does any woman manage on that for a year if they are the sole or main breadwinner?)
tax breaks for private schools (how does something so socially divisive get a state subsidy? Why don't we go the whole hog and subsidise gated residential developments as well?)
BoJo (since when do British people vote for stupid people because we find them endearing or aimiably laughable? We are not the US and we do not need Bertie Wooster as Mayor of London)
the school "run" (nuff said)
pushy parents (I cannot get my head around the need for parents to fill their kids' every waking hour with stimulation - they need plenty of down time, otherwise they'll grow up neurotic)
restaurants who refuse to let children in (we were all children once you know)

There must be loads more, but I've run out of energy to rant...

lol feel better now?

Baby Einstein is certainly a con, but so are 80 % or so of parenting books and mags - fecking aromatherapy for babies, homeopathy for ANYONE, people who think that because the Government says something it must be true, grrrrrrrr

Yes, Caz - feels like a weight off my shoulders :-)

ah, but there's always stupid crap in life. People are generally a bit gullible, bless em.

Chuck 'surface clean' toys in the washing machine at 30oC wool cycle when disgustingly filthy, and if they fall apart - well you were going to chuck it anyway, so you can only be pleasantly surprised.

Get over it, move on, be happy xx

agree with you on all these although not too stressed about the restaurants one as we so rarely go to them.

Low-down shelves full of sweets. That's my big gripe.

About private schools; I have to differ (although I didn't go to one myself). Private schools don't get tax breaks. They're charities. Charities just aren't taxed. Not the same thing at all.

Oh god yes low down shelves by a till, many people will have bought a half sucked mars bar (DS), you have to assume baby spit when you buy from those shelves.

All the useless shite that is marketed to first time parents, bless em. Nappysan for instance erm what? A device that encloses nappies for your own safety and hygiene needs, bin anyone? nappy sack? 200 for a pound.

£20 for a swaddling blanket? hmm kay, I have an
evil masterplan to open a shop appealing to pfb parents only, also sell slings and re-useable nappies (that you could look at /try before you buy) which would be useful. Shame my credit rating would make Nick Leeson cry.

Really the sling/nappy/baby stuff is such a good idea, would do a roaring trade in the predominately middle class area that I live. There's a baby shop that does well that sells baby T-shirts for £30, I mean come on, that is ridiculous, I walked in there when first open and quickly walked out, realising they didn't want my sort there.

I too get annoyed at all the crap that is marketed at new parents. They must make people feel like a neurotic mess as they can't afford all these essential items that means they are obviously a child abuser.

What;s with all this obsession with household cleaners as well that nuke anything remotely living within a five mile radius.

a) - what is wrong with building up a natural immunity to germs? How on earth did the human race survive thus far without these fabulous and expensive products?

b) - what exactly is the point anyway whe your baby is just as likely to eat mud from the garden as it is to eat food off a sterile surface...........

Perhaps then I an a total innocent, but the stuff being marketed at Parents I find wonderful (excluding baby slings). I used to hate shooping with a passions but I have had such a laugh getting all this stuff. I know is it really needed? Baby einstein - brill - did not buy it but what a hoot. Also I loved a little pair of Nike booties with a tiny little swoosh on it - outstanding.

And on the Bojo issue that does annoy me - people say how did he win when he is "stupid people because we find them endearing or aimiably laughable?" and he will not have had chance to really done anything in london yet. Wait a year and then lets see.

Restaurants who refuse to let children - good there has to be some places that you can escape from children - esp as so many pubs now are full of kids!

Tax breaks for schools - so what? Without them it would put the price of schools totally out of reach of many parents.

hmmm.......cleaning products a huge bugbear for me. Am certain all those essential sterile surface sprays/air 'fresheners'/deodourises etc etc have something to do with rise in asthma/allergies.
Private schools.....THE GOVERNMENT SHOULD MAKE STATE SCHOOLS A BIT BLOODY BETTER THEN MAYBE WE WOULDN"T NEED THEM!

I feel so much better now

Think some posters haven't got it about private schools. The clue is in the name. PRIVATE SCHOOL. Geddit? Pay for it yourself. Charitable status is a tax benefit by another name. Please do not say you are paying twice; your choice. Like driving a car when you could go by bus. Get a grip.

Over-stimulated kids. Suffering Jesus, they fetch up to play with your sprog and then want inflict endless replays of their little dramas on you. Bugger. Off. They're so focussed on adult approval when they should be getting into training to be teens who couldn't give a rat's ass about what any adult without money in their hand is saying.

Statutory maternity pay - such a joke, yet it's touted here in Godzone as if it was the ultimate in aspirations for Oz women, instead of the bare minimum it actually represents. You should read the shite here: "I raised 14 kids on two dollars a week and it never did me any harm", etc. etc. FFS.

Er..that's it for now.

Hand wash and dry clean only children's clothes.

• Having to get up every morning.
• DC and DH constantly wanting food. I fed you yesterday!
• Cigarettes not being amazingly health-boosting. Ditto booze.

Just bung the whole lot in the washing machine

lol Beautiful

One thing that really got to me the other day ...

... a parenting book that suggested miming actions when you wanted your children to do things such as put their shoes on, as a serious alternative to nagging.

Can you imagine doing a Marcel Marceau when trying to get out the door at 7.45 am on a school morning??

Loathe the school run too Daddster ....

Lol re. Marcel Marceau.

I hear you, Eric - we wash down surfaces with soapy water and nothing more. Have always wondered whether the chemicals in those antibacterial sprays are more risky than the bacteria TBH...

Toy shops with breakable/unsuitable toys at toddler height (grrr).

Don't want to turn this into the same old tired "why subsidise private schools?" thread, but in economic speak, due to their divisive effects, private schools are a demerit good.

Baby Einstein books are just rubbish - I picked up one in the children's "fighting-pit" in the corner of a kiddy-cafe once. The drawings were crap - my 3yo DD could do better with a box fuzzy felts - and the supposed rhymes didn't scan at all.

What are "pfb parents" BTW?

Please use your indicators when using a roundabout.

You know - THE BIG STICK THING JUST BY YOUR HAND - JUST THERE.

It makes some pretty orange lights flash that tell the other nice people who also use the same road as you WHERE THE FUCK YOU ARE GOING.

No I do no thing they can be a demerit good - they do provide a service and actually turn out some well educated children - in that they can read and write - the same can not be said of some state schools. And their diverse nature??

See thoughtful article by Simon Jenkins on the question of whether private schools are of sufficient public benefit to justify charitable status.

And as a former comprehensive kid, I share his view that they aint isn't.

aren't

the pictue on msn homepage atm, of a guy wearing a t shirt that says

'inner beauty is so overrated'

sums up so much.

Eric - indicators are fab, however many owners use them to indicate they might do something and then go do the opposite after lulling into false sense of knowing wtf they're going to do next.......etc...etc....

Middle lane hoggers on the motorway. That's all I'm prepared to say at this time.

pfb - precious first-born, btw