So we have 2 children. The first 1 i couldn't breastfeeding because she was in neonatal until for 9 dqysb after she was born. Our 2nd baby i breastfed for about 4 months, but she always had formula feed after because she was not getting enough milk from me. So my husband went away when the baby was about 8 weeks old because his mother was not well. I understood and supported him as I should. I stayed home with the kids 1 at school and baby at home, no support from anyone for over 2 months i managed alone. Once I couldn't manage breastfeeding and bottle feeding plus sorting my 1st child out i stopped breastfeeding without telling before hand.while he was still away. He was upset about it. and 2 plus years still brings it up and makes seems like I did such a horrific thing. Same as when I asked him to wash dishes more than 10 yrs after his mum first visited us. I came from night shift cleaned,did the shopping and cooked and also picked up and dropped off our guest. After all that I was tired and cranky so I asked him to do dishes maybe in not the nicest way but to this day he still brings it up. Another recent my sister did said awful thing about him which was not true. I told her so we haven't spoken in nearly 4 yrs. He was angry about it, i asked lets solve but no he didn't want to. But for 4 yrs we can't have a chat or argument him bringing it up and all this time I felt ashamed and guilty for something I had nothing to do with and that I condemned. Now we are getting divorced and those are the things that he brings everytime I want talk to him about moving forward work things out during our separation. Bear in mind I financially supported our family for more 5 yrs alone, did everything in the home. Am I really that bad? Sorry for the rant , please share your opinions i can't talk to anyone about this